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Topic: 253: Heal Yourself With Crystals  (Read 19475 times)

znarf

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #30
Ok, I'll take a field trip to the SD location and tell you how many metric tons of crazy I see.

Fatty Bo Batty

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #31


—it’s known as jing in Chinese energy, and it’s all about sexual potency...
Goop
Specifically Chinese energy? Like I have to travel to Hong Kong in order for this to work, or can I get some energy sent to me in the mail? Do I need to find a j.o. buddy specifically of Chinese descent to help charge my rock? Maybe my djinn knows an energy fulfillment wish I can make.

Seriously though, I wonder how much of these people's knowledge base comes from popular culture and movies like The Golden Child.
Ragnarok Boobies, June 12, 2017, 03:11:53 pm

Don't forget "What the *bleep* Do We Know?"

CaptainLaserPants

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #32
Also, has Nutshell ever considered doing ASMR in her Coachella voice?
CaptainLaserPants, June 11, 2017, 02:59:17 pm

nooooooo
NutshellGulag, June 11, 2017, 09:20:59 pm

I was asking for a friend!

duz

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #33
which crystals stop joke stealing ? ? ?
Shell Game, June 10, 2017, 06:54:12 pm

Any crystal can, if you throw it hard enough.
Corn Syrup Dawnswalker Yavuz Shell Game Ragnarok Boobies Agent (gobble, gobble) Coop RoeCocoa

A Meat

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #34
which crystals stop joke stealing ? ? ?
Shell Game, June 10, 2017, 06:54:12 pm

Any crystal can, if you throw it hard enough.
duz, June 12, 2017, 09:22:27 pm
they improve the sound quality and take care of haters as well
Shell Game

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #35
oh i posted this in discord and didnt even know there was an episode



im glad that as my interest in semi-precious stones waned after i left primary school, they remained in the  hearts of people seeking to capitalize off idiots

accepting change

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #36
in case you're wondering, thats almost definitely the dash of a pt cruiser

Sherman Tank

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #37
in case you're wondering, thats almost definitely the dash of a pt cruiser


Megacrex inepta, June 13, 2017, 01:39:25 am

Because of course it is.

The only PT Cruiser owner I ever knew was a joyless schoolmarm who wanted to abolish summer vacation for reasons that had nothing to do with educational efficiency or effectiveness.

Ok, I'll take a field trip to the SD location and tell you how many metric tons of crazy I see.
znarf, June 12, 2017, 04:28:57 pm

I'll stand you a beer if you tell me when you're coming to SD.

Cheapskate

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #38
oh i posted this in discord and didnt even know there was an episode



im glad that as my interest in semi-precious stones waned after i left primary school, they remained in the  hearts of people seeking to capitalize off idiots
Megacrex inepta, June 13, 2017, 01:37:42 am

Imagine the air bag deploying.
chai tea latte Corn Syrup

znarf

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #39
For context on Nutshell's Goop refererence early in...

Goop: Jade Eggs For Your Yoni (mildly NSFW header image)

Q: What are the benefits?
A: Jade eggs can help cultivate sexual energy, increase orgasm, balance the cycle, stimulate key reflexology around vaginal walls, tighten and tone, prevent uterine prolapse, increase control of the whole perineum and bladder, develop and clear chi pathways in the body, intensify feminine energy, and invigorate our life force. To name a few!

The jade creates kidney strength—it’s known as jing in Chinese energy, and it’s all about sexual potency, and even beauty—if your hormones are balanced, your skin will look better. It’s a holistic combination of things, where one benefit builds to another. Jade also takes away negativity and cleanses—it’s a very heavy material, very powerful.Goop
Lemon, June 12, 2017, 09:22:43 am

Yomi is Japanese for "reading the mind of your oppone.."  Oh Yoni you say.  I guess at least in strip malls that have card games and new age-y stores it would be a convenient shopping trip.

EYE OF ZA

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #40
I notice that no one else has mentioned "vibe up"

Cleretic

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #41
in case you're wondering, thats almost definitely the dash of a pt cruiser


Megacrex inepta, June 13, 2017, 01:39:25 am

Because of course it is.

The only PT Cruiser owner I ever knew was a joyless schoolmarm who wanted to abolish summer vacation for reasons that had nothing to do with educational efficiency or effectiveness.
YOU ARE UNDER SHERMAN TANK ATTACK, June 13, 2017, 02:44:51 am

Was she the villain in a cartoon aimed at elementary school kids?

Eider Duck

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #42
So whenever my internet goes down it's because of Mercury's influence? I better start gluing pretty rocks to my router.

oh i posted this in discord and didnt even know there was an episode



im glad that as my interest in semi-precious stones waned after i left primary school, they remained in the  hearts of people seeking to capitalize off idiots
Megacrex inepta, June 13, 2017, 01:37:42 am

"My car gets a love charge"?

Knitting Machine

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #43
I'd be curious to see the number of these crystal healers that also have heavy metal poisoning from cooking with their crystals, because it's not like rocks can have other things in them like oh say Gallium, Mercury, Lead, Arsenic, or a boatload of other stuff you shouldn't ingest.
Ragnarok Boobies, June 11, 2017, 12:03:19 pm

There was actually a crystal/herb shop in my hometown, and the owner got in a heap of trouble because he was selling asbestos.

EDIT: Apparently this is not an uncommon phenomenon!
LancashireMcGee, June 11, 2017, 03:18:46 pm

From my teenage Wiccan days I remember reading a magical gemstone guide that claimed asbestos was only dangerous because "modern man overused or" and cited it being by ancient Greeks to prove it was actually safe.

Shell Game

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253: Heal Yourself With Crystals #44
From my teenage Wiccan days I remember reading a magical gemstone guide that claimed asbestos was only dangerous because "modern man overused or" and cited it being by ancient Greeks to prove it was actually safe.
Knitting Machine, June 14, 2017, 11:36:48 am
I mean, part of its danger IS in its overuse, but it's because breathing it in causes problems and having large quantities of it stuffed into every part of our day to day lives increases the risks exponentially, not just the hubris of the mundane modern man. It's super interesting the ways in which mystickal types distort even their cherry-picked factoids.

"We used it in ancient Greece and in the 70s! Those two entities are good foundations to what we should and shouldn't use. No regrets in those times! Nope!" :p

My roommate and I are trying to get through this pseudoscientific book about "Earthing", the practice of walking barefoot outside to connect to the soil and cure cancer (among other things) and it's FILLED with half-facts about electricity and shit. It's nuts.
Ragnarok Boobies Corn Syrup Sherman Tank