Projects => The F Plus => Topic started by: Lemon on February 25, 2014, 08:12:05 pm
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Lemon on February 25, 2014, 08:12:05 pm
with Boots Raingear, Jack Chick, Victor Laszlo, Frank West, and Lemon.
Content for this episode was compiled by Cheapskate (Cheapskate Reviews Free Media)
Edited by Boots Raingear.
As social mores have changed in the past century, the wedding has evolved dramatically. No longer is it a dogmatic ceremony of tradition, but it can be a celebration of love, community and family. Or it can simply be a fun party. Or, with the internet's help, it could just be another vain blog entry where you explain to a hostaged crowd what a special snowflake you are. This week, The F Plus can't stop laughing (our tongues turned blue!)
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: crow on February 25, 2014, 09:57:12 pm
Western culture is dead.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Good Ol Cburgs on February 25, 2014, 10:09:25 pm
That wedding RPG mentioned in the episode is literally a four-hundred meg download. I'll be sure to deliver a trip report.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Runic on February 25, 2014, 11:10:20 pm
Oh fine. God fucking damn it, the things I do for you people.
I'll try to take screenshots.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: cyclopeantrash on February 25, 2014, 11:19:26 pm
Not yet. It hasn't suffered enough to be given that privilege.
I'm fully surprised there weren't any brony wedding ceremonies on that site. MicroMissles, February 25, 2014, 11:19:26 pm
Oh god, i hope there is a my little pony friendship is pagan hooffasting ceremony
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: chai tea latte on February 25, 2014, 11:40:15 pm
I couldn't find a hoffasting ceremony anywhere online, and a search for "brony" on offbeatbride yielded only one false positive. That said, I'm really glad you guys did this episode, because I love this site.
Both Aaron and I have many interests, so it was helpful to narrow down the theme to things that both of us enjoy equally: steampunk and Muppets. Aaron and the groomsmen adopted a Western/science fiction look to compliment the style of my dress, and my parents both attended in steampunk outfits they designed. We handed out spin drums instead of rice, used cue cards inspired by Stephen Colbert's "The Wørd" to entertain our guests while we exchanged private vows, and had a fabulous Muppet wedding cake. ... Aaron is an artist and amateur blacksmith, and he made goggles for the entire wedding party, as well as ray guns (some of which fired LED "bullets"), and flame-powered centerpieces.
I also actually kind of like this wedding (http://offbeatbride.com/2013/05/electrical-engineer-wedding) between two electrical engineers. Parts of it are just super tacky, though (that fucking wish fountain).
e: I'm actually kind of astonished at how boring the lesbian polyamorous wedding turned out to be.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: A Meat on February 26, 2014, 05:14:38 am
Adam and I consider ourselves to be film buffs and we love film quotes. We worked these into our theme with cupcake flags featuring a quote from our favourite films, and tables named after planets from various films and TV programmes! Our stationery font was from The Nightmare Before Christmas.
Tell us about the ceremony: I walked down the aisle to the theme from the video game Metal Gear Solid. My brother read Shakespeare's Sonnet 116.
to top this off, here are the toasting glasses they used: (http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41ND3xegBnL.jpg)
edit: I bet this will not offend your elderly Jewish grandmother who just wants you and your bride to have a good old-fashioned Jewish wedding. http://offbeatbride.com/2012/10/offbeat-yarmulkes#.Uw3M0oWpcaA
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: advancedclass on February 26, 2014, 11:54:03 am
I feel cheated on the Twin Peaks wedding. That awful Log Marketing Lady officiator/planner mentioned the /movie/ and I want the full traumatic experience of Ray Wise tying up the bride and groom in a train car ceremony with masks and monkey shrieks and a David Bowie cameo. You disappoint in so many ways, offbeatbride.com.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Emperor Jack Chick on February 26, 2014, 11:59:20 am
The wedding RPG is not very good.
Just an FYI to anyone else who d/l's it and attempts to play it.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Down10 on February 26, 2014, 01:02:44 pm
Special Snowflakes + Nerd Interests – Good Taste = Theme Weddings
The most notorious example of this was Sean Parker's $10 million LOTR-themed wedding (http://www.vanityfair.com/style/2013/09/photos-sean-parker-wedding) last year.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Moriarty on February 26, 2014, 01:11:13 pm
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Geremy Tibbles on February 26, 2014, 01:32:25 pm
10 points to Frank West for referencing Fire Pro.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Tiny Prancer on February 26, 2014, 01:35:25 pm
I feel cheated on the Twin Peaks wedding. That awful Log Marketing Lady officiator/planner mentioned the /movie/ and I want the full traumatic experience of Ray Wise tying up the bride and groom in a train car ceremony with masks and monkey shrieks and a David Bowie cameo. You disappoint in so many ways, offbeatbride.com. advancedclass, February 26, 2014, 11:54:03 am
If you have a David Lynch-themed wedding in general and it fails to make all who attend it unsettled and unsure of themselves then you did a fucking shit job
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Isfahan on February 26, 2014, 05:09:22 pm
I'm cross-posting my thoughts from the SA thread, in response to some people commenting about how the readers didn't seem able to work out what made the material all that bad.
I spoke to this a little bit in the episode comments already, but I'll speak to it here too. It's hard to articulate what makes someone cringe over the material, true, but here's what I came up with after giving it a think:
These tryhard gimmick nerd weddings exploit the social contract. A wedding is an event that people take off work for. It's an event people will fly hundreds of miles to attend. It's an event that generally reflects poorly on someone who turns down the invitation for non-essential reasons. Perhaps it's done so subconsciously, but these people picked up on the fact that a wedding provides not only a captive audience, but a captive audience expected to show an outward appearance of enjoying themselves and approving of the proceedings. Top it off with an event that's all about them, and you have a geeky fringe-appeal party legitimized by the broader social acceptance of the wedding part of it. A couple of the ones read about in the episode hardly seemed like weddings at all, like the wedding part was an afterthought to all the shit they actually wanted to do. The Harry Potter/ren-fair one illustrated this particularly well.
So now you have an event where 58-year-old Aunt Miriam is wearing a top hat with gears glued on it and drinking from a Mega Man E-tank mug while Uncle Bill is passed a microphone and feels pressure to talk about how awesome the bride and groom are even though the officiant already did so for a half hour at the ceremony (while dressed as Chris Redfield). It feels less like a wedding at that point and more like a micro-convention that two people successfully guilted their friends and family into populating.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: KingKalamari on February 26, 2014, 05:49:29 pm
What is it with obnoxious nerds and moustaches, anyway?
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Runic on February 26, 2014, 07:43:10 pm
Also, is there any particular reason why this one was formatted differently, without bumpers and such?
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: EYE OF ZA on February 26, 2014, 07:44:28 pm
It's ironic, because they make you look silly, but they're also manly, or something.
It's like asking whence bacon, or whence steampunk.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: One Of The Crappy Pokemon That Nobody Likes on February 26, 2014, 11:36:07 pm
Re: The question of "Why would anyone particularly object to all this?"
Theme weddings aren't necessarily a bad thing. And even a kind of quirky theme wedding is fine.
Say you and your partner were super into astronomy. On your first date you really connected when you started discussing it, and a lot of your subsequent dates involved stargazing. It's a passion you both share, and as such you both wanted to commemorate that in the wedding's theme. It really wouldn't be difficult at all to come up with some truly lovely decorations based on outer space and the heavenly bodies.
Or say both of you are bakers. Again, this is a pretty easy sell in terms of color schemes for the decor, plus you could have a totally kickass cake AND a lot of other pastries for the guests to enjoy. It'd be fun, and it'd be a celebration of your passion in life.
Or maybe you two are dog trainers. You met through work, befriended a lot of coworkers and clients, and eventually went into business for yourselves. It's just been a huge part of both of your lives. It could be genuinely fun to ask your friends to bring their well-behaved pets to the ceremony, with the reception held at a huge park where the dogs could play with each other and with their masters.
I can see offbeat weddings and themes being just fine, if it relates to the two getting hitched in some genuinely significant, productive way. The electrical engineer wedding Kal-elk linked to is a good example of what I mean. Sure it's a little weird, but it adds a little personal flair to the event and isn't obstructive. And to that end, yes I can even accept the idea of a comic-, cartoon-, or even game-themed wedding. Hell, I can even accept subtle nerd stuff in a wedding between just two plain ordinary geeks, if it's not tacky or distracting. But that's not what's going on in this episode.
There's a world of difference between "our flower arrangements are based on the color schemes of our favorite superheroes" and "lol all the witnesses had to wear cheap plastic Power Ranger helmets and the priest was dressed as Galactus!!! XD SEE BECAUSE WE READ COMICS A LOT ROFL" The first example is just injecting a little bit of nerdery into your big day, while the latter is just jumping in front of folks and essentially yelling "GUYS I LOVE THIS POP CULTURE THING! I DUNNO IF YOU KNEW THAT BUT POP CULTURE!!!! NERD CRAP!!!! EXCELSIOR!!!!" while rubbing a copy of The Killing Joke in their faces and slobbering all over your Fantastic Four t-shirt.
Over the years we've looked at nerds who seriously have no engaging interests, and certainly no identity beyond "I like this TV show!" The ONLY thing they want to talk about is how much they enjoy easily digestible entertainment. It's totally fine to like that entertainment, of course, but to have that be the only thing you're ever willing to meditate on is plain unhealthy. Congratulations, you're a fan of a popular geek franchise, but why make it the only side to your personality? Why does everything have to revolve around the fact that you just really like Star Wars? Why do you have to introduce yourself as a Trekkie to everyone you meet, regardless of context or whether or not the other person would even know what the fuck you were talking about? Why must everything presented to you be compared to Kingdom Hearts?
That's what's going on in a lot of these weddings. It's less about celebrating your life together and your hopefully fulfilling future, and more about celebrating how much you love Ghost in the Shell. It's less about asking your family to share in an important milestone in your life, and more about writing big speeches about how very special of a snowflake you are and pointing out how you hot-glued Lego pieces to your dress because you're just that raaaandooooom~ It's less about writing meaningful vows, and more about laughing at grandma's confused look every time you shoehorned an internet meme into the ceremony.
Sure, these geeks are having fun. But see, that's because they find constantly pestering people about zombies and ren faire shit to be really fucking fun. I cringed when we read the Tropers' godawful stories about being annoying dorks, and I sure as hell cringed at these tryhards.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: 🍆 on February 27, 2014, 02:17:32 am
Yayyy Frank West episode.
I got the Wendy O Williams reference! But like all the computer stuff beyond "no one reads the Terms & Conditions" went totally over my head.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: JT on February 28, 2014, 11:53:23 pm
Over the years we've looked at nerds who seriously have no engaging interests, and certainly no identity beyond "I like this TV show!" The ONLY thing they want to talk about is how much they enjoy easily digestible entertainment. It's totally fine to like that entertainment, of course, but to have that be the only thing you're ever willing to meditate on is plain unhealthy. Congratulations, you're a fan of a popular geek franchise, but why make it the only side to your personality? Why does everything have to revolve around the fact that you just really like Star Wars? Why do you have to introduce yourself as a Trekkie to everyone you meet, regardless of context or whether or not the other person would even know what the fuck you were talking about? Why must everything presented to you be compared to Kingdom Hearts? portaxx, February 26, 2014, 11:36:07 pm
This has always been my rule of thumb as well. It's like, if you like putting dragon dildos up your butt, then hey, not my cup of tea, but sure. Go nuts. Build a little log cabin out of them. Who gives a shit. But when dragon dildos become more than just a hobby, and instead turn into a way of life, then there's probably something wrong with you.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Cheapskate on March 01, 2014, 01:55:53 am
Over the years we've looked at nerds who seriously have no engaging interests, and certainly no identity beyond "I like this TV show!" The ONLY thing they want to talk about is how much they enjoy easily digestible entertainment. It's totally fine to like that entertainment, of course, but to have that be the only thing you're ever willing to meditate on is plain unhealthy. Congratulations, you're a fan of a popular geek franchise, but why make it the only side to your personality? Why does everything have to revolve around the fact that you just really like Star Wars? Why do you have to introduce yourself as a Trekkie to everyone you meet, regardless of context or whether or not the other person would even know what the fuck you were talking about? Why must everything presented to you be compared to Kingdom Hearts? portaxx, February 26, 2014, 11:36:07 pm
Agreed. When your entire identity is focused around media, you're basically delegating your identity to a goddamn screenwriter.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: montrith on March 01, 2014, 07:11:13 am
Dammit, I do fucking want to play that wedding RPG.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: STOG on March 01, 2014, 09:55:22 am
I just finished this episode at work, and I thought the video game gastropub wedding was particularly cringeworthy. Other people have said why this is a horrible thing, but I'm personally focusing on them looking back at this ceremony in 25 years and realizing that they just married themselves to video games rather than each other.
Hope their marriage lasts that long! (spoiler: it won't)
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Boots Raingear on March 01, 2014, 10:10:41 am
I can't help but picture this line being said at an intervention by a frustrated mother to her son, who is wearing Sora's outfit and Lion King ears.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Sherman Tank on January 17, 2016, 05:48:18 pm
So... is there going to be a follow up "Offbeat Divorce Litigant" episode?
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Nikaer Drekin on March 17, 2016, 09:47:44 am
So, in case anyone was wondering, Offbeat Bride is still exactly the same. (http://offbeatbride.com/2016/03/wedding-sword-battle)
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: goombapolice on March 17, 2016, 09:50:42 am
Hi Hello please do another Offbeat Bride episode
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Dawnswalker on March 17, 2016, 02:58:57 pm
I'd rather have a followup episode about Offbeat Divorcée.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Isfahan on March 17, 2016, 08:44:40 pm
"I made my lawyer dress up as Franziska von Karma! Tyler's lawyer was dressed as Nick Fury, which doesn't even make sense bcuz Fury isn't a lawyer. Daredevil would've been sooo on-point thematically (and is even in the same comic universe!) but I guess you can tell by now why we started drifting apart."
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: goombapolice on March 18, 2016, 05:12:10 am
Small Themed Microbrewery Divorce In A Donkey Kong Style Gastropub
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: STOG on March 18, 2016, 10:30:11 am
"I made my lawyer dress up as Franziska von Karma! Tyler's lawyer was dressed as Nick Fury, which doesn't even make sense bcuz Fury isn't a lawyer. Daredevil would've been sooo on-point thematically (and is even in the same comic universe!) but I guess you can tell by now why we started drifting apart." Isfahan, March 17, 2016, 08:44:40 pm
"Oh fuck, this divorce proceeding is going to be a mock WWE tag-team wrestling match? I am such a fool! Oh shit, I gotta start a GoFundMe for a lawyer that'll dress up as The Undertaker!"
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: goombapolice on March 18, 2016, 11:03:59 am
Video Games and Barn Divorce
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Sherman Tank on March 18, 2016, 11:28:42 am
High score gets the dog.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Cheapskate on March 19, 2016, 01:15:47 am
"I made my lawyer dress up as Franziska von Karma! Tyler's lawyer was dressed as Nick Fury, which doesn't even make sense bcuz Fury isn't a lawyer. Daredevil would've been sooo on-point thematically (and is even in the same comic universe!) but I guess you can tell by now why we started drifting apart." Isfahan, March 17, 2016, 08:44:40 pm
"Oh fuck, this divorce proceeding is going to be a mock WWE tag-team wrestling match? I am such a fool! Oh shit, I gotta start a GoFundMe for a lawyer that'll dress up as The Undertaker!" STOG, March 18, 2016, 10:30:11 am
It's a well known fact that if you knock out the judge with a steel chair, you can present as much hearsay testimony as you want until the judge wakes up.
Title: Episode 129: You May Now Fistbump The Spouse
Post by: Shell Game on June 28, 2017, 10:36:15 am
Although it's a hard call to make, I think this my favorite episode. It's so easy to picture the cringeworthy photos. Being two hours away from Portland, I've definitely heard my fair share of wedding stories like these. Vaguely hippie weddings are also hilarious.