New forum game: F Plus Association Football Congress!

[moooo566 (taylor's version)]

I accept my colours may not have been "traditional" but please could we compromise and still write "juicy" on the left buttcheek?

[Shell Game]

what does a head of sport science even do?

by the by i hate soccer and I'd tend to think anti-jules is probably of the same mindset

[Cheapskate]

The head of sports science is in charge of injury prevention.

[MilfParade]

The post-match interview after the game v. 100 kids is actually really wonderful. Amazing straight man, that guy

[Shell Game]

The head of sports science is in charge of injury prevention.

Ah, I now understand the low salary.

[Dr. Buttplug]

I accept my colours may not have been "traditional" but please could we compromise and still write "juicy" on the left buttcheek?

If I had posted my full original pink kit you would have seen I had written "Juicy" on the right cheek. The clear compromise is to juicy each cheek.

[Cheapskate]

Dr. Buttplug, can you post the full kit designs so I can test them in the game?

[Dr. Buttplug]

It seems I lost the kit design or didn't save it properly, but I did use this transparency of Nessie. I don't think I ever did much with the shorts and socks besides color match and you should put juicy on each cheek.

[Cheapskate]

Oh well. Turns out I’m not skilled enough with the editor to get custom kits to work right without overwriting the existing ones anyway.

I hope to see you around 10am Mountain time tomorrow on Discord for the kickoff!

[Cheapskate]

About to go live. Check in any time today and I’ll probably be around.

[Cheapskate]

The preseason is a chance for us to bring in some new faces and to develop a tactical style. Because our best players are wingers and strikers, we’re playing two different looks: a 4-2-4 and a 4-4-2, each emphasizing crossing and advancing along the wings.




We can’t really afford to buy new players, but we can totally afford to beg richer teams to loan us their teenagers for the season. Hayden Lindley from Aston Villa, Tyler Morton from Liverpool, Owen Moffat of Celtic, and Tony Weston of Rangers join the several loanees who are already here.

Scotland has a preseason cup tournament, the Premier Sports Cup. We sail through the group stages undefeated against smaller clubs, but fall to Dundee in the knockout stage and are eliminated.

The Championship season has an inconsistent start. The only constant is that there are a whole lot of goals.





It’s September, the transfer window has closed until January, and we’re in fourth place with a 2-0-2 record. Which is somehow good enough to make me Manager of the Month.




Thanks to everyone who joined me on the stream today. I’ll be back around 10:30AM Mountain time on Sunday.

 

[Cheapskate]

September starts poorly, with an embarrassing loss on the road to the semi-professional Northern Irish side Coleraine.



But some other things are going our way: Sham bam bamina! and Anti-Jules have kept injuries under control, and Advancedclass and Unregistered Hypercum have teamed up to hire more coaches.



We go undefeated for the rest of the month, including a cup win over Kelty Hearts, a draw with league-leading Dunfermline, and a win over Partick Thistle and their batshit insane mascot.






Meanwhile, I take a quick jaunt out of town.



On October 1, we’re in second place, with pretty good numbers all-around… except for the finances.




I’ll be back on Friday!

[MilfParade]

Huge fan of Partick Thistle's insane mascot, which I assumed was supposed to be a guy named Patrick Thistle, based on a poor reading of the club's name. Thank you for the updates!

[Cheapskate]

October is a busy month for us. Luckily, the leadership of Dr. Buttplug has our team in high spirits.




We’re unceremoniously dumped from another cup when we’re upset by the semi-professional Edinburgh City side. (Edinburgh City FC was purely a social club with no soccer matches at all from 1955 to 1985.)



But league matches are much better to us: we beat Hamilton Academicals (a team that outlived the academy it’s named after), Greenock Morton, Raith Rovers (who once accepted an offer to get paid £300,000 in exchange for giving someone the manager’s job), and our rematch with Partick Thistle (formerly owned by a lottery winner who tried to leave the team to the fans in his will, only for the executors to say “no way” and keep the team for themselves). After a draw with league-leading Arbroath, we’re at the top of the table.

The match of the month is the insane 6-3 shootout against Raith.



Our under-18 side falls to the Wee Jambos, but they’re still in first place, too.



Stats—except money—are looking good. But we’ll make it up with TV money when we get promoted. Of course, if we don’t get promoted…

[moooo566 (taylor's version)]

A week late, but that Partick Thistle mascot is one of those where they take a kid's drawing, right? It's not? Oh...

We seem to have issues with semi-professional teams, perhaps we should just refuse to play anyone who isn't earning a living wage from their football?

Is there anything we can do about finances in the more immediate future? Find a californian hedge fund with a really really ugly logo to sponsor our mascot?