Episode 106: Asgard Doesn't Have Alimony Laws

[Lemon]

with Boots Raingear, Adam Bozarth, Jimmyfranks, Kumquatxop, and Lemon.

Edited by Lemon

Content for this episode was provided by Erminea Heart, Gaylord McHappenstance, and Sherlockian

Love is a curious thing. The thing that drives two people together into a passionate embrace is as complicated as it is powerful. But the thing that drives one person to claim that they're married to a Norse god? That's called "being a crazy person". We're taking a look at Lokiwives and godspouses: People who claim to be in a polygamous relationship with one or more gods, and report that the sex is terrific. This week, wherever you go, whatever you do, these people still won't make any sense.

[advancedclass]

I had a professor who taught Iceland literature, Old English, and Norse mythology and he cheerfully hated almost every modern appropriation of those stories and  myths. I wish I'd kept in touch with him just so I could direct him to this episode, but I don't think I could afford the volume of whiskey I'd need to send him as an apology.

Why do these sad, crazy ladies never talk about being astrally married to Zeus or Ra? Or even someone else in the Norse pantheon?

[montrith]

I had a professor who taught Iceland literature, Old English, and Norse mythology and he cheerfully hated almost every modern appropriation of those stories and  myths. I wish I'd kept in touch with him just so I could direct him to this episode, but I don't think I could afford the volume of whiskey I'd need to send him as an apology.

Why do these sad, crazy ladies never talk about being astrally married to Zeus or Ra? Or even someone else in the Norse pantheon?

Because there hasn't been a hugely popular movie about those guys, duh.

[Goose Goose Honk At Me Now]

I had a professor who taught Iceland literature, Old English, and Norse mythology and he cheerfully hated almost every modern appropriation of those stories and  myths. I wish I'd kept in touch with him just so I could direct him to this episode, but I don't think I could afford the volume of whiskey I'd need to send him as an apology.

Why do these sad, crazy ladies never talk about being astrally married to Zeus or Ra? Or even someone else in the Norse pantheon?

Because there hasn't been a hugely popular movie about those guys, duh.

And I guess "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" isn't nearly as sexy as "(whatever vague blubbering Loki does about... some shit? man i don't know i was blind drunk for most of The Avengers)"

[Emperor Jack Chick]

I'm confident nerds won't latch onto 300 or the god of war series.

[montrith]

I'm confident nerds won't latch onto 300 or the god of war series.

Too much blood, too little bad boys brooding about their dark past while looking really sad. It's not hot if they just kill people, they need to do it in STYLE.

[Ansemaru]

You know, I'm pleasantly surprised that there wasn't nearly as much embarrassing Avengers/Thor fandom bullshit in this episode as I expected there to be. I genuinely didn't think most of the references to Tom Hiddleston would be from Adam, rather than from the reading material.

[nilvoid]

Why do these sad, crazy ladies never talk about being astrally married to Zeus or Ra? Or even someone else in the Norse pantheon?

Zeus isn't a wisecracking twink, that's why.

[Cheapskate]

In Azerbaijan, circumcisions are known as "weddings" because the boys undergoing the ritual are wedding themselves to Allah.

What I'm saying is that fangirls should totally start appropriating Islam and see how well that works out for them.

[Alpha Starsquatch]

I had a professor who taught Iceland literature, Old English, and Norse mythology and he cheerfully hated almost every modern appropriation of those stories and  myths. I wish I'd kept in touch with him just so I could direct him to this episode, but I don't think I could afford the volume of whiskey I'd need to send him as an apology.

Why do these sad, crazy ladies never talk about being astrally married to Zeus or Ra? Or even someone else in the Norse pantheon?

Oh you'd be surprised. I found one married to Dionysus and another married to Ares.

[Lemon]

Why do these sad, crazy ladies never talk about being astrally married to Zeus or Ra? Or even someone else in the Norse pantheon?

Sherlockian's document had a post from an asexual who is in a D/s relationship with Bast.

[advancedclass]

Why do these sad, crazy ladies never talk about being astrally married to Zeus or Ra? Or even someone else in the Norse pantheon?

Sherlockian's document had a post from an asexual who is in a D/s relationship with Bast.

Now I'm sorry I asked. Dammit, Sherlockian!

[Alpha Starsquatch]

God this episode is giving me flashbacks to SpectrumX.

[Goose Goose Honk At Me Now]

God this episode is giving me flashbacks to SpectrumX.

Very telling common factors between episodes:
* An incredibly powerful higher being is constantly and fully attached to one mortal. Like just giving one human ALL their time, lovin', and terrible pseudo-steampunk blueprints of Hell.
* A figure in mythology who is widely considered to either be evil or solely out to cause chaos for shits and giggles becomes a snugglebug who's just misunderstood. And who understands them? Their loving, patient mortal spouse. Who, by virtue of their tolerance for god-shenanigans, becomes something superior to a god--after all, if you can tame something divine, you're working some next-level shit.
* The sex is so great you guys don't even know

[Isfahan]

Also the general desperate need to feel loved by something.