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Topic: Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited  (Read 28803 times)

Goose Goose Honk At Me Now

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited
Juice and I are, as you may have inferred by now, buddies. Recently I learned that he has a unique ability I can only dream of possessing.

He sleep-texts.

Here are some of the texts I have received since this phenomenon began.

-----------
We have been the most important things to be able I am going through a variety of different ways to get a good idea
*   *   *
(received as a tweet)
To summon ur 2d gf into this plain 1st build appropriate altar on second rack of oven, turn gas 2 max, insert head n shoulders
------------

Sadly, my phone's deleted most of the others, but watch this space. I've asked him to dig up some other gems, because I know he's got them.
icarus count_actuala Delcat Liatai

A Whirring Bone-White Gleech

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #1
To summon ur 2d gf into this plain 1st build appropriate altar on second rack of oven, turn gas 2 max, insert head n shoulders
Cuddlesquid, July 12, 2013, 03:22:17 pm

I wish there was some way to give Juice a bulb for that.

chai tea latte

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #2
yeah that's utterly beautiful.

cyclopeantrash

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #3
KNEEL BEFORE THE PROPHET JUICE! JUICE ALONE WILL GUIDE US THROUGH THE ENDTIMES!

What other commands does Juice have for us!?
« Last Edit: July 12, 2013, 06:58:28 pm by MicroMissles »

icarus

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #4
never tell us how this dark magic comes to be

i'm really enjoying my mental image of juice sleep-talking these things and the phone transcribing them

Goose Goose Honk At Me Now

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #5
I have no idea how it works. I just know that I wake up in the morning to texts timestamped between 2 and 3 AM that are... well... that.

Once he went to sleep early enough that I got a weird text around midnight or so. It didn't make a lot of sense, so I asked him if he was asleep. His reply? "Not yet." First thing next morning he informed me I'd been lied to by sleep-Juice.

Yossarian

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #6
I now live in fear before the almighty.

NutshellGulag

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #7
I do this if someone calls me on the phone when I am asleep.

TheCrawlingChaos

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #8
We have been the most important things to be able I am going through a variety of different ways to get a good idea
Cuddlesquid, July 12, 2013, 03:22:17 pm

But has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like? (I admit, both of those made me LOL. Funny sleep behavior stories are the best. Apparently I have been known to surf for porn in my sleep, for instance.)

count_actuala

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #9
This thread was posted with my permission, jsyk.

Within my family, specifically those of us who share DNA with my father, there is a colorful history of what some might call 'sleep problems.' The present manifestation of my sleepy time shenanigans is fairly harmless, but I started sleepwalking when I was about six and kept it up for around seven years. The earliest incident, at least in my memory, involved me waking up in our neighbor's hay field. I was so young that I didn't register the gravity of the situation, and figured "Well, I guess I'm in a hay field now." 

ETA: From my phone archive, some more sleep texts:

"I made a mistake and delete the following link to the next few days ago on the phone"

"A raw food diet will be a good day to all of your business and look at the end"


« Last Edit: July 13, 2013, 10:17:49 am by Juice Unlimited »

Yossarian

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #10
Are you Mike Birbiglia?

count_actuala

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #11
No, but I sympathize with his plight. If my dad is any indication this shit only gets weirder.

Alpha Starsquatch

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #12
Juice you're like a werewolf, except instead of transforming into a wolf in the night, you become horse_ebooks.
NutshellGulag chai tea latte nilvoid Liatai

Goose Goose Honk At Me Now

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #13
Juice you're like a werewolf, except instead of transforming into a wolf in the night, you become horse_ebooks.
Al, July 13, 2013, 10:56:54 am
Juice_ebooks.

Chaz

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Sleep Texts From Juice Unlimited #14
Juice_ebooksCuddlesquid, July 13, 2013, 04:55:35 pm

The Juice_e_est books.
Maxine Headroom