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This is Werner Karl Heisenflüff. He knows exactly where he wants to be skritched. If you wiggle your fingers in front of him, he grabs your hand and puts it where he wants it. Lately he's taken to having a weird autoerotic asphyxiation thing, though, where he'll rub his throat against something until he has a coughing fit, and he insists on me rubbing his throat and it feels for all the world like I'm doing something very, very dirty with him.
When I adopted Werner I lived in a condo with a balcony with a great view of a yard where a bunch of neighborhood cats always hung out, and I had a bird feeder, and that kept him entertained enough during the day. But when I moved back to Seattle I lost out on all that, and he started to very quickly go crazy. So I went to a shelter and looked for a young-ish cat who would play with him. One cat in particular kept on trying to play with the other cats there, even though they'd have nothing of it, and she'd just shrug it off and keep on playing. So I knew that was the cat for Werner.
I brought her home and tried doing the scent-based quarantine thing so they'd get used to each other, and that cat broke out of quarantine. Werner was screaming his head off at me and at the new cat – how DARE I bring someone else into the house, despite him being desperate for companionship?! – and this new cat just walked right up to him, rubbed noses with him, and kept on walking, and Werner just got very confused. Within days they were snuggling and playing nicely with each other.
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So, this is Fiona (named after the Adventure Time character). She loves the laser pointer. She understands that the dot comes from a little thing. She has trained me to play with her by threatening to knock fragile stuff off of shelves until I oblige her. I know that's what she's doing because if I hear her knocking stuff off of the shelf and I come downstairs to stop her she jumps down and starts looking at the floor, trying to find the dot. One time I was sitting at the computer, she jumped in my lap, knocked a laser pointer off my desk into my lap, then jumped down on the floor and started looking around for the dot. She loves that fucking laser dot.