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Topic: 299: Lavender Scissors Overlord  (Read 5893 times)

Lemon

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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord
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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #1
The cool thing about urban fantasy bingo is that you can play by pouring a paint bucket on your sheet
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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #2
If TV Tropes was a person it would be this guy.

Goldenrod Tag Suggestion District Comptroller: "all the vampires ever", "blood", "dragons", "fantasy", "fiction", "magic", "nerds", "please give me money for my stupid idea", "poor use of simile", "somehow not a dozerfleet episode", "somehow not a reddit episode", "tag!", "zombies"

EDIT: I must be slipping. I forgot "focus on a single twit".
Lemon
« Last Edit: March 17, 2019, 06:56:43 pm by Small Purge of my Angry Sherman Tank »

Neal

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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #3
STOG was even more out of sync with reality than usual in this one, and it was glorious.

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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #4
DEMON LORD Rum Punch:

1 gallon Hawaiian Punch
1 jar maraschino cherries
1 8oz can of pineapple
4oz of Captain Morgan's Light Rum

Mix together in a Gatorade cooler. Pour into a fancy glasses, pinning a piece of pineapple with a plastic blade. Present to a feeeemale of your choice and get ready to get laaaaaid. Make sure to show her your sweet dragon tats to get her into the mood.
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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #5
CAINE’S LAWYER HAS BEEN SAVAGELY ASSAULTED AND ISN’T DEALING WELL WITH HER NEW RESPONSIBILITIES AS ALPHA TO THE LOCAL WEREWOLF PACK.


Tag suggestion: a law firm of werewolves.
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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #6
Alright, having listened to this episode I have two important questions regarding Caine Deathwalker and the book series in which he stars:

1. I might have missed it, but was there an actual reason Caine was murdering those bikers in that bar? It seemed very much like it was just because he didn't like their gang name...
2. After listening to the snippets read in the episode, and with the knowledge that there are, like, a dozen books in this series I have to ask: How is there anyone left alive in the universe for Caine to fight after book two?

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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #7
I used to work with someone whose side gig was urban fantasy/paranormal romance writing and what I have learned from her is that genre literary agents refuse writing of a quality above joss whedon and the trendiness of tropes is the measure by which books live or die.

So really the only thing keeping morgan blayde from the shelves of barnes & noble is a cursory edit to the blurbs
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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #8
I used to work with someone whose side gig was urban fantasy/paranormal romance writing and what I have learned from her is that genre literary agents refuse writing of a quality above joss whedon and the trendiness of tropes is the measure by which books live or die.

So really the only thing keeping morgan blayde from the shelves of barnes & noble is a cursory edit to the blurbs
LINDA, March 18, 2019, 08:30:51 am

On a similar note: Can I just say that, as someone who's been trying to learn how to write, the general popularity of Urban Fantasy and other such "YA" fiction has become the most goddamned annoying thing in the universe every time I try to look up writing advice I have to wade through pages and pages of garbage-ass articles about shit like "How to Write the Next Hunger Games", "[Writing Advice Topic I am Searching for]...For YA Authors!" or articles that present themselves as generalized writing advice but whose examples only consist of popular YA books.

I do not need articles telling me how to specifically write YA, Google!
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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #9
I guess since "nice" is such a bad word you should make ballp.it switch each occurrence of it to "monstercock."

This ep feels like such a throwback, I love it! Like being visited by some old, weird friends that tell me about bad things. (So my actual friends I guess.)
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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #10
I absolutely love how bonkers every other sentence in this is.

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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #11
cain deathwalker is so fucking cool i cant stand it

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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #12
I am incredibly happy to have Portaxx's dragon voice back.
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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #13
I kind of wish this one would have been left for Garbage Day 2. Between the monster bear in search of monster honey and the two genders (snake demons and fae), this shit is RIFE with artistic potential.

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299: Lavender Scissors Overlord #14
The fight scene was kind of amazing to me, because it's written exactly like how a sixteen year old who owns katanas would write a fight scene. All the complicated maneuvers and really specific blows, all the stuff like "by moving around them in a circle I became impossible to hit," it's just such a pure distillation of that kind of narcissistic adolescent thought that it almost loops back around and becomes art again. I'm an author and I don't think I could write a scene that better captures the Sweatpants Ninja essence better than this.
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