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Topic: spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy  (Read 18956 times)

TheCrawlingChaos

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy
Ah, Supernatural fandom, where the men are men, the women are hormonal, the brothers fuck each other and everyone has a dog cock. As we all know from episode 45 there's a whole lot of real-person fanfiction (henceforth RPF) where Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki (henceforth J2) are in love/fucking/what-have-you. However, did you know that there is a really, really big contingent of over-invested fans (henceforth "tinhats") who believe the RPF to the point where they believe that there is a giant, decade-spanning, malevolent conspiracy by the CW to keep the general public blind to their love? And that they, the tinhats are the only ones who can see through the facade to this purest of all loves between two mid-list TV actors? Of course you did, because you post here and you know how this kind of thing goes in Internet fandom. As such, I am here to share the Livejournal site spn_gossip, a positive hotbed of this sort of crazy, with the rest of you atrocity tourists. As I elaborated recently I doubt this would make for good episode material due to its highly esoteric and inaccessible nature to the layman but I couldn't in good conscience deny the entertainment to any of you with a few hours to kill, so here goes.

Speak the Truth: A Storify of the two palling around with in-depth annotations of how every single gesture and touch absolutely screams "we're madly in love and sending secret messages about it to the fans." It also goes into a lot of detail about the conspiracies surrounding their respective wives, Genevieve Padalecki and Daneel Ackles-Harris, and how those two are evil beards who only exist for the CW to disguise the true, underlying passion of J2 with studied, boring heteronormativity. As you might imagine, these ladies get a lot of heat 'round these parts.

And now, some links to regular posts. There is one hell of a backlog for this community so I honestly just ended up cherry-picking stuff at random. It doesn't help that Livejournal's search function is so, soooooo bad these days, but even so finding batshit insanity is like playing darts in a room wallpapered with dartboards.

As a "crazy hat" this pisses me off: I know celebrity tweets are held up to a certain degree of public scrutiny that most mundane humans' aren't, but holy shit, the over-investment.

And jeez, the J/G marriage must be worse than even I imagine! (And I think it's pretty bad. These two do not like each other at all.) ITK, incidentally, is an acronym for "in the know," referring to those who supposedly have inside information about the workings of J2. No actual concrete data exists on them, obviously, but they're all taken for granted to exist.

You said it yourself--he's there to live in Jensen's house. And keep Jensen's beard from causing trouble out of boredom. For all we know Jensen can't stand the leech but he's the only one who can tolerate DH for any length of time. Jensen starts a wine label with his brother-in-law, whining ensues.

LOL, so now her first name and last name are fake and a joke. Awethum, lol. Following Genevieve Padalecki neé Cortese's marriage to Jared, the brave truth-seers of spn_gossip speculate about the reality of her marriage.

And truly, this is only the tip of the iceberg. If I find a way to recover some of the really good shit I've seen there in the past I'll post a few updates in coming weeks.

Isfahan

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #1
I'd love a digest of some of the hate Genevieve and Daneel have received just for being married to these guys.

Knitting Machine

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #2
I'd love a digest of some of the hate Genevieve and Daneel have received just for being married to these guys.
Isfahan, April 18, 2015, 04:42:44 pm

I forget the exact details, but when one of them got pregnant the crazy fangirls were convinced that she was acting as a surrogate mother for Jensen's and Jared's love child. Secretly, of course.

chai tea latte

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #3
I'd love a digest of some of the hate Genevieve and Daneel have received just for being married to these guys.
Isfahan, April 18, 2015, 04:42:44 pm

Hating on Danneel. You know that sucks, right?
“Danneel, you bitch! Jensen is mine!”

Oh, hey, random fifteen year old girl who is hating on Danneel because she wants a man that is like twenty years older to be together with her. I just wanted to ask you something…

What the hell is wrong with you?!

Look, I know, Jensen Ackles is a beautiful and awesome man. But, girl, he is like twenty years older than you! By the way, do you realize that, if he actually dated you, he’d be put in jail for pedophilia? Oh, and apart from that age difference thing: You don’t even know him. Yeah, probably you’ve read things about him. Things, that other people wrote about him. You have no idea who he is. (I mean unless you’ve met him. But, well, I don’t think you have. Besides, I think if you actually met him, you wouldn’t be able to say a word. Just sayin’.)

I totally understand if you have a crush on him. But, please, stop this whole hating on Danneel thing. They’re married, they have a daughter, a girl like you will definitely not end it. Don’t you understand?

God, I’m so tired of little girls hating on Danneel because they have a crush on Jensen. Yes, I say little girls although I’m not older than them. I don’t say that they’re little girls because of their age. I say they’re little girls because of how they behave. I know, this post is probably a little bit rude but I just had to say it.

also thanks tumblr saviour for the phenomenon of 'tag your hate'
https://www.tumblr.com/search/danneel%20hate
https://www.tumblr.com/search/genevieve%20hate

TheCrawlingChaos

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #4
I'd love a digest of some of the hate Genevieve and Daneel have received just for being married to these guys.
Isfahan, April 18, 2015, 04:42:44 pm

I'm sure I can arrange that. Gimme a few days.

Isfahan

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #5
Oh, hey, random fifteen year old girl who is hating on Danneel because she wants a man that is like twenty years older to be together with her.chai tea latte, April 19, 2015, 12:42:10 am

There's a bit of cognitive dissonance going on with a teenage girl fantasizing about a star being with her personally and fantasizing about that same star having superhot secret gay sex with his costar. I don't doubt there are fangirls who do both of these things, but how much of an overlap do you all think there really is?

I mean, they do realize that a gay Jensen or Jared puts them out of the picture, right?

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #6
trust me, they know fully well they aren't in the picture if gay sex is happening. Think of it like dudes fantasizing about lesbians, two hot guys making out > one hot guy on his own. Also worth noting are the very visible elements of internalized misogyny to these girls when they complain about women "getting in the way" of their fantasized gay romance.

It's fascinating and totally unsurprising to me that these arguments are exactly the same as the ones that one directioners who insist Louis and Harry are totes gay lovers and their gfs are evil studio-appointed beards and taylor swift is a homophobic bitch antichrist

A Meat

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #7
Oh, hey, random fifteen year old girl who is hating on Danneel because she wants a man that is like twenty years older to be together with her.chai tea latte, April 19, 2015, 12:42:10 am

There's a bit of cognitive dissonance going on with a teenage girl fantasizing about a star being with her personally and fantasizing about that same star having superhot secret gay sex with his costar. I don't doubt there are fangirls who do both of these things, but how much of an overlap do you all think there really is?

I mean, they do realize that a gay Jensen or Jared puts them out of the picture, right?
Isfahan, April 19, 2015, 09:09:04 am

It's the same as dudes and lesbians, it's just a very heterosexual thing to do, since if you find a person of the opposite gender attractive, but you're uncomfortable thinking about them being with someone of your gender who isn't you, you can just think about them being with another member of the opposite gender, because you find both of them attractive, so it's fine.

The problem is when it stops being something in fantasy-land and becomes something you actually think is real life.

fake edit: beaten by a matter of minutes.

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #8
A lot of girls smooshing dude dolls together have internalized misogyny up to their eyeballs, to the point that they get really upset when thinking about sex where ladies are concerned, themselves included.  Oftentimes, they're using one or both of the dudes as a sexual proxy so they can get their jollies without the mental intrusion of a filthy vagina. 

It can be difficult to enjoy sexuality if you've got a constant virgin/whore problem in the brain.

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #9
I've kind of wondered about this, but does someone who knows this in a more in-depth way know actually what kind of fucking these teenage girls depict all these gay hunks having? Is it all "top/bottom" or "seme/uke" shit like I keep hearing about?

What I'm trying to find out is whether or not it's all just penis-in-vagina sex by proxy and whether it's all traditional sexist power roles even in supposedly gay fiction. I just don't think many teenage girls are hardcore cockrub warriors

Tiny Prancer

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #10
I don't have hard data on this but the "seme/uke" stuff is pretty much the deal from what I recall. monster cock penetration is also the main thing they're into the dudes doing, although BJs are pretty up there too. I think frotting usually only gets involved with specific communities of people who are less into the idea of it being a "seme/uke" thing and more of a "gay relationship where no one is top or bottom" thing since frot doesn't involve the powerplay that oral or monster cock does.

It's also worth noting that the people who frame it more as a "seme/uke" or "top/bottom" thing are the ones most likely to have some really creepy internalized misogyny involved, or at least that's what I've noticed.

Isfahan

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #11
The points made so far remind me of the Denise thread where uglynoodles flipped through Denise's stash of gay manga porn and noticed that nothing explicit is actually depicted. (If the location is thrown off by images loading, it's the post with the title "How Does I Touched Self" in bold text) It's very telling that folks can hold seemingly contradictory attitudes towards depictions of sexual acts, being aroused at the thought and concept of it but too self-conscious to actually want to see it depicted or engage in it themselves.

montrith

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spn_gossip: The Supernatural Conspiracy #12
I yearn for the days when straight dudes fucking each other shipping was limited to anime fandoms. Supernatural is not the only thing that suffers from it, as you'll probably know if you've followed Directioneers at all. That still gets my vote for Most Insane Fangirls. There are 30 something women writing conspiracy theory websites about the music company trying to hide the fact some boys 10-15 years their junior are all gay for each other.