Thought #1: "man, I could go for a caramel apple"
Thought #2: "no, terrible idea, caramel apples are the world's most disappointing/frustrating food, along with candy apples"
Thought #3: "could I, like, slice up a candy apple and eat it in slices? Would that work? Is that a crazy person idea?"
It's late and I'm tired and bored at work