ballp.it

Snakes In The Ball Pit => Yay, I get to talk about me! => This Is A Thing I Made => Topic started by: Bobalay on February 07, 2016, 09:40:57 pm

Title: Absolutely Not A Dollop Ripoff: The Weird Side of The Qin Dynasty
Post by: Bobalay on February 07, 2016, 09:40:57 pm

Click me! (https://soundcloud.com/bobby-lay-1/big-dicks-and-bad-assassins)

To celebrate Chinese New Year, I got together with friends chai tea latte and Mister Frog and related to them the marvelous tale of Qin Shi Huangdi's life. Reigning in the 3rd century BC, Shi Huangdi is best known for being an efficient tyrant who unified China and commissioned the building of several world-famous monuments, but also killed a whole bunch of people. Today, we went a little deeper and look at all the possibly-true stories of a guy who probably had weird sex hang-ups and then went bonkers from mercury poisoning.

This was organized over a weekend and it was our first time recording stuff for some of us, so the audio quality is a little janky and there are some brief drops, but I hope you enjoy nonetheless!

Title: Absolutely Not A Dollop Ripoff: The Weird Side of The Qin Dynasty
Post by: Bodark on February 08, 2016, 02:26:11 am

I'm only four minutes in and I'm enjoying this immensely.

Edit: as far as I can tell Lao "MASSIVE DONG" Ai is the protagonist, here

Title: Absolutely Not A Dollop Ripoff: The Weird Side of The Qin Dynasty
Post by: Bodark on February 08, 2016, 03:00:12 am

What a wild fucking ride. That was fantastic.

Title: Absolutely Not A Dollop Ripoff: The Weird Side of The Qin Dynasty
Post by: Vinny Possum on February 08, 2016, 04:10:01 am

You should cover Liu Zeye (aka the Former Deposed Emperor of Liu Song) next.

Shit is cray cray.

Title: Absolutely Not A Dollop Ripoff: The Weird Side of The Qin Dynasty
Post by: Yavuz on February 08, 2016, 01:07:45 pm

If you want to do a podcast entirely centered on psychotic rulers who did weird shit, allow me to interest you in the tale of Justinian II, the last emperor of the Byzantine Empire's Heraclian dynasty. He pissed off a bunch of people after landing on the throne, and got unseated by a rebellious general. His nose was then mutilated, a practice that was a very common way in the Byzantine Empire to render someone unsuitable for the throne (as an emperor wasn't supposed to have visible physical deformities), and he was packed off to Cherson in Crimea. There, he made an alliance with the Khagan of the Khazars, a local Turkic empire, married the khagan's sister, and returned to the throne. But how did he try to hide the fact that his nostrils had been sliced open (he is sometimes known as "Justinian the Slit-nosed")? According to the records, he hid it with a fake nose made of gold. Unsurprisingly, when he returned to the throne bent on revenge, he was not a better ruler than before, and he was beheaded in a revolt, while his six-year-old son was dragged out of the church where he and his mother had sought sanctuary and murdered. Byzantine history is fun.