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Topic: 264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos  (Read 14200 times)

xX_sp00ks_Xx

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264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos #30
Hey, I'm not done.



Product description

Make self-love more fun with Paco’s Taco, an ultra-soft open-faced stroker that puts pleasure in the palm of your hand. Satisfies every time – simply open the box, apply lube liberally and wrap around your “meat.” Second and third helpings are encouraged! Advanced open-faced stroker technology. Soft and textured surface for realistic sensations. Ultra-soft TPE material. Latex- and phthalate-free. Reusable and easy to clean. Wash with warm water and soap, rinse thoroughly and dry completely with a lint-free cloth or towel. Stroker measures 5.75" long by 4" wide and will satisfy most cocks. FREE Paco’s “Sauce” water-based lubricant packet included.


★ ★ ★ ★ ☆ Brilliant; awful mess to clean up, but brilliant!

By Anon Ymous on May 25, 2016

Okay, so first of all, I'd give this 6 stars out of 5 if I could. Better than a fleshlight in terms of satisfaction. There's a way your hand can grip that a fleshlight can't, and what this gel pad does is make the grip feel smooth and not-like-a-hand to your member, and it lets your hand do a little less work. Extremely satisfying orgasm, followed by the worst cleanup experience imaginable. At least with a fleshlight, you don't tend to get mess everywhere, and you can just run the thing under the faucet when you're done. The Taco is VERY messy, and requires a more... intimate cleanup that will force you to think about your life and feel guilty and horrid. For this dreadful cleanup process that comes immediately after... well, coming, I have removed two of the original 6 stars for a total of 4/5. Totally worth the money, just be ready for an extra insult in the post-orgasm-reality-check.

★ ★ ★ ★ ☆ Double use! Just make sure you clean it first.

By BigAsh on January 23, 2017

Well, it's better than ya hand! and when you're done with it, you can have fun throwing its sticky body at walls and watching it slide down!

SHAMBA~1.SBB

Bunnybread

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264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos #31
Feel Me, then take me home

I like that, on the box, they encourage you whip out your dong and try it right there (in the mythical store that would actually sell this).


It needs more variety though....


ShockO Taco - It’s like our normal Taco but with a little cayenne pepper in the lube.

Titillating Taco - Just place in between the lady’s roundymounds as you both pretend that this is a satisfying alternative to the real thing …. and she’s really gonna wait till marriage.

AlarmClockO Taco - Bluetooth link it with your phone and wake yourself up real nice in the morning.

SockO Taco - For the nostalgic wank session.  Take yourself back to the oldest (and still best) method of containment and cleanup.

BarackO Taco - Jerk yourself happy and dream of fond recent memories regarding domestic and international policy

Torrid Taco -  So hot and dry that clean up will be a cinch as everything instantly evaporates.  Caution: WILL DEFINITELY result in 3rd degree burns if used on any body parts.
SHAMBA~1.SBB Lemon Sherman Tank junior associate faguar Big Stinky immaculateguts curlicuecal

SHAMBA~1.SBB

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264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos #32
I look forward to your recording of that ad.

SirSlarty

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264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos #33
Joe Flacco Taco - score big and get hit big! Enjoy 40 minutes of pleasure then use the enclosed lead pipe to bash your balls.

Aljonso

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264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos #34
NSFW content. Click to show.
Spooks, November 15, 2017, 03:56:03 am

I'm gonna stack these on top of each other and make a dick arch
chai tea latte

Neal

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264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos #35
I'm pretty sure these aren't officially licensed.
NSFW content. Click to show.

Lemonedit: Put dildos behind nsfw tags please
« Last Edit: December 06, 2017, 12:43:46 pm by Lemon »

SHAMBA~1.SBB

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264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos #36
I know they aren't to scale, but I love seeing that tiny, keychain-sized lightsaber whip next to the enormous C-3PO butt plug and Yoda dick.

Aljonso

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264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos #37
Imagine looking into someone's ass and seeing C-3PO
Agent (gobble, gobble) Coop SHAMBA~1.SBB chai tea latte curlicuecal