star wars thread

[Bunnybread]

Bears lost to the Vikings, last night.  20-17.  *Sigh*

Oh and they showed a commercial for another one of your Glowstick Sword/Yowling Bear movies.

How many of these goddamn things they gonna make?  I mean, these space movies didn't even have a chick with tri-tits.  What's the point?

Anyways, have fun. 

[Bunnybread]

Ok, that previous post came off a lot shittier than I wanted it to. 

Now I will talk about the things I enjoy regarding the various wars between the stars. 

I had a precious few movies recorded in my youth.  Empire Strikes Back was one of them.  Luke getting his ass kicked by his dad was quite cool to my impressionable kid self.  That's when I knew I wanted to be big and strong and have a deep voice.  I willed that shit to happen.  Thank you, Darth Vader.  You've taught me how to be the deadbeat dad that I am today. 
I didn't even see the first (4th?) movie till they got re-released in the 90s so I kinda thought Kanobi was always a ghost.

The Phantom Menace is goddamn hilarious.  It's in my top ten awesome movies.  Right up there with Dolemite and Showgirls.  You got a dude who can't write dialogue directing a kid who can't act and a frog that no one asked for.  Every reason that people seemingly have to hate the movie is a reason to celebrate it.

Now I got a couple questions for actual fans. 

1 - Would you consider yourself more a fan of the movies or just the world that they exist in?

2 - Did anyone really like the Rogue film?  I watched about half of it on Netflix before I realized that it actually got placed on Netflix.  I don't think that's a good sign since I doubt any of the others were put up there.

Anyways, I'm sure I will see this next one at some point.  Just like I've seen nearly every other movie that commercials tell me to go watch.  Sorry if I came off dickish before. 

[Mique]

I saw Star Trek: Rebel Fun in theaters, and didn't walk out half way through! I actually do kinda like it for two reasons.

Now I don't actually remember most of the movie, and I certainly can't recall any of the new characters' names, but the battle at the end was basically everything I want from a Star Wars movie.

The big dumb space battle in Rogue One is really the type of thing they could have used in Forced Awakening instead of just doing a lazy rehash of the battle from Episode IV.
Given that the series is called Star Wars and not Star Trek, I really feel that intergalactic war should be a selling point of the movies instead of just "oh shit we need a space battle! Just show some toys shooting space lasers at other toys and we'll come up with how they got there later."

The second reason I liked it is because the movie actually managed to undo years of dumb jokes and make Darth Vader threatening again. I think that one scene with him at the end made the whole movie worth it for me.

Aside from those two things? It wasn't great. CG Tarkin and Leia were super unsettling to look at, especially on the big screen.
Maybe I'm just being miserable and ungrateful, but part of me really hopes the next few Star Wars movies are so mediocre that it starts to kill off the franchise for good. I'd really like to see some new big things instead of just an everlasting deluge of nostalgia.

[Bunnybread]

Thank you, Mique. 

Now.... I want more real fan responses.  How pissed are you at the new Battlefront game? 

[Agent (gobble, gobble) Coop]

Thank you, Mique. 

Now.... I want more real fan responses.  How pissed are you at the new Battlefront game?

I wasn't planning on picking it up, might play Kotor 2 again

[Victor Laszlo]

Maybe I'm just being miserable and ungrateful, but part of me really hopes the next few Star Wars movies are so mediocre that it starts to kill off the franchise for good. I'd really like to see some new big things instead of just an everlasting deluge of nostalgia.

What's that?  You want an everlasting deluge of nostalgia?  Well have we got the film you've been waiting for!  Star Wars Episode VIII: The Fan Service Checklist is in theaters now!  It sure is a Star Wars movie, you can tell because it has all of the elements of a Star Wars movie!  And we mean all of the elements!

I think there are three or four more Star Wars movies currently in production, so maybe don't hold your breath on the franchise going away anytime soon.  Disney didn't buy it in order to kill it.

[I Liked That Joke]

I saw the Last Jedi today and I liked it a whole lot! So did my parents!

[EYE OF ZA]

I saw The Last Jedi a week or so ago and liked it but didn't like its runtime or the fact that a good third of the movie wouldn't have happened if people had sat down and talked to each other. It was cool and fun, but messy in a way that I wasn't expecting from Certified Disney Product^TM.

Pre-warning: the only other Star Wars movies I'd seen all the way through were the prequels.

The whole casino planet bit was entirely irrelevant to the story, to the point that when the plan was suggested I felt like, wait, what? You can just pop off and take a break from this dire chase scene? So much of that felt superfluous. Why the two different codebreakers? Why introduce a need for a codebreaker in the first place? Just have Finn and Rose sneak onto the ship to disable the tracker. Why does Leia get blown into space and then make it safely back to the ship? All it does is leave her knocked out for a bit so that Po Dameron's subplot about blindly following authority can happen, thanks to the fact that Holdo is a dick about not telling people what the plan is.  Like, okay, sure, she doesn't want to tell him at first because he's just a pilot, but once he leads a god damn mutiny and holds her at gunpoint why doesn't she just say hey, idiot, here's the plan.

The real kicker is that these useless subplots don't progress the story at all. Finn and Rose don't disable the tracker. Leia interrupts Po Dameron's mutiny. When these subplots start, the Resistance is running from the First Order and suffering losses. When these subplots end, the Resistance is running from the First Order and suffering losses. The story loses nothing if you remove them entirely.

One of the other things the movie is real sloppy with is its themes. "Let go of the past" is its big overarching message, and that's the one it gets right. I already mentioned how Po's arc is about blind faith in authority. Maybe it was meant to be about how they all need to trust each other, but that's not what comes across in the film. Finn and Rose's arc ends with her keeping him from making a heroic sacrifice to save the Resistance base. She explains that she did it because they aren't going to win by making sacrifices. So was Holdo wrong to sacrifice herself to blow up the First Order ship? Is it wrong to make sacrifices for the greater good? Is it better for someone to die in an assault than it is to sacrifice themselves to stop that assault?

Don't get me wrong, I thought the movie was enjoyable, and it's got some really good moments. The whole Luke/Rey/Kylo plot is solid and has this underlying sense of uncertainty and dissatisfaction that felt both interesting and Star Warsy. But for a lot of the movie, I had the feeling that the plot had been written off the cuff, and they'd never gone back to revise it.

[Victor Laszlo]

See, I won't say I liked the Finn/Rose plan parts, because the casino bit was pretty dumb and it sounds like the casino was actually really far away and if "codebreaking" is just putting a metal conductor onto the computer panel then why couldn't BB-8 just do it?  It was an incredibly drawn out and forced way to introduce a character.  But, I did like that the hotshots mutinied and came up with a seat-of-your-pants plan to save the day, and not only did it not work but through the codebreaker's betrayal led to the situation getting a whole lot worse since that's how the First Order found the cloaked ships and killed 90% of the remaining resistance.  You can't solve all of your problems with moxie and a beeping robot is a lesson that took 8 movies to get to.

If Holdo planned to be on a suicide mission the whole time, which was clear from her goodbye scene with Leia, then why wait so long to lightspeed through the First Order ship?  You could have done that at any point, and certainly before 90% of the transports were destroyed.  That should have been your plan all along.  Although the First Order seemed to bounce right back based on the amount of firepower they landed on the Hoth lookalike so what was even the point?

The Jedi mind trick usually only works on weak minds.  Why did Kylo Ren fall for it so hard?  Is he a weak mind?  He's a whiny little manbaby but he's not been that specific sort of weak mind up to this point. 

People being able to survive in space is sort of implied in Star Wars since all of the big spaceships have an open hangar for the fighters and people walk around as if there is gravity and air to breathe, so that's all well and good, but Leia was blown out into the -455 degree, airless void of space and while unconscious uses the Force (has Leia ever used the Force before?  We learned in ROTJ that she is strong with it, but this feels like a heavy lift for her first documented use) to return to the ship?


I stand by my checklist opinion.  This movie has all of the elements of a Star Wars movie.  If you really like Star Wars, you will like it.  As a film in general, it's not great.

[I Liked That Joke]

I figured that was more of a normal, social mind trick, no force required. That character is just a general sucker.

[KingKalamari]

Man, folks on the Rotten Tomatoes user reviews are getting real worked up over the space laser movie...

I am a huge Star Wars fan and was excited to see TLJ. However, I have to agree with many of the other audience reviews and say I was immensely disappointed when I left the theater. The humor was forced and often silly. SJW themes throughout. Characters from TFA were not developed any further in this movie. I could go on and on...The worst though was how Lukes character was portrayed. Hamill made the most with what he was given, but the Luke in this movie is entirely inconsistent with original trilogy. WTF is all I can say after seeing this.

I won't lie. The movie, as a film, was entertaining. Over time, however, I started to hate the movie more and more as I thought about how it fit into the SW universe. It doesn't. It doesn't fit at all. It should have been a new SciFi movie rather than Star Wars. Star Wars has an existing canon and universe which, even after Disney wiped the canonical slate, has its own rules, history, and expectations. Yet, even the movie is self-aware that it is trying to erase the established saga that has existed over generations. They literally say, "Let the past die." We came to this movie because of the past, because of its history. Why did they not just start from scratch and build a new franchise, rather than murder an existing one? Many people, myself included, have lost out hope for the future of the franchise, and have even chosen not to go see the next one because the canon is now beyond redemption.

This is made all the more potent when you consider the American politics that sneak their way into this film. Disney, we do not like it when movies are used as vehicles for political promotion. Star Wars has always been about good vs evil. Why do you so readily want to blur that line? You have dated this movie, and have removed any chance of it becoming a classic by your luck for propaganda. I have all the movies on DVD, but I will not buy this one. You have destroyed my love for Star Wars and murdered my hero, Luke Skywalker, replacing him with a bitter, depressed, spiteful old man. And SPOILERS, just when Luke starts to act like Luke again, you kill him again!

The only hope you have in redeeming yourself is remaking Episode VIII with a better plot before you proceed to Ep IX, but you won't because you don't care about the fans of the franchise, as long as you got your money. For shame.

The death of star wars fan
Sorry to star with this words, but Disney thought that this was a pixar movie... I just saw the movie... it couldn't be worse, how can this company specialized in story telling get so many things so wrong:
1) Luke throwing the laser was the first blow... this is not luke, this is not what luke is all about. He represents a generation, that simply is not what was shown.
2) Eliminating the mask... the dark side.. the mask in everyone of us all... simply ridiculous. Lack of obscureness and respect for the dark side.
3) So many dumb jokes, at the worst moments, in the theater only two person laugh.
4) Rey's training, missed it. This decision was made by someone that doesn't develop a character, that doesn't matures it.... very bad film director
5) Lukes death...Not the moment... not the occasion, bad timming.Every one has a reason for its existence, if lukes character was reserved for this... please... you should have killed him in the 3rd movie.
6)Yoda, you could have done better
This was a lack of respect for the fans, for the story, to many characters... but so little in depth. George Lukes must be having nightmares... or be happy that the Phantom menace isn't the worst episode.
That's it, Camilo T

Aside from the visuals this was one of the worst moves I have ever seen, along with the force awakens. There is not a single logical plot point in relation to the physics of the star wars universe, and the acting, editing, directing, and writing are atrocious. Mark hamill gives a good performance but it is impossible to tolerate Disney annihilaing every philosophical aspect of Star Wars, which are the only redeeming aspect of any the original films in the first place. This is a cash grab and a set up for the use of the Star Wars brand to be weaponized for billions and to stage a propaganda campaign for the brainwashing of children, which is Disney's obvious agenda since it's military branch did cartoons for the us military during the nuclear and anti Brown people propaganda campaigns after ww2. Watch Disney channel commercials with sociological intiution. You could write your doctorate in psychology deconstructing the subliminal garbage in this film, but most importantly there is a conspiracy and collective group think involved in the good reviews and acclaim this movie is recieving. Compare to the greatest films of all time. Even the revenant or lotr, this movie is just ontologically bad filmmaking. Think for yourself, remember the wisdom of master Yoda and obi-wan and stay true to your jedi or sith teachings. Fight this empire of Disney. They sell conservatives espn national anthems and big foot shows on the history channel and push sjw politics in Star Wars . They take both sides for your money it's a con. Anyone who likes this movie for its feminist values is a fool, like Disney cares about fighting the phallocracy, they are the vehicle of sexism, they sexualize little girls and turn them hem into pop gods. Have we lost our minds or what, the last jedi sucked and was really stupid. Anyway I'll let the movie speak for itself and your education limit your ability to see through it.

[SirSlarty]

Amazing. Every word in those reviews are wrong.

[Mique]

It's an enjoyable movie to watch.
There are a few scenes I really liked, and I thought they took some really ballsy directions in the plot, and I do e.

Aside from that, I basically agree with what Victor and RSA said.
The more I think about it, the less I like the movie. Especially Rey. I really want to support her, but her characterization and motivations feel so weak.

It would have been so much more interesting if she had taken Kylo Ren's hand and joined him. Her interactions with him throughout the film felt so much more genuine than anything with either Luke or Han, and it seemed like there was a real connection between them, but she has to be the good guy because she just is for some reason. They even had that scene with her meditating with Luke where she 'went straight for the dark side', but I guess that didn't matter in this movie.

All in all, the movie was a lot different than I was expecting, and I don't think the writer/director got lazy at any point like in Force Awakens, but I do think he tried too hard in some areas and not enough in others.

[EYE OF ZA]

I think the problem with Kylo and Rey joining forces and saying "fuck it" to both the Jedi and the Sith are that it would be too interesting. There's still stories to be told in a world where that happened, for sure, but it would be hard to make them Star Wars Official Disney Product^TM movies. And you saw those reviews from people who are furious that a movie like Star Wars could have a message of "hey, maybe the past wasn't great". Imagine if the movie had actually ended up changing something.

[Nikaer Drekin]

See, I won't say I liked the Finn/Rose plan parts, because the casino bit was pretty dumb and it sounds like the casino was actually really far away and if "codebreaking" is just putting a metal conductor onto the computer panel then why couldn't BB-8 just do it?  It was an incredibly drawn out and forced way to introduce a character.  But, I did like that the hotshots mutinied and came up with a seat-of-your-pants plan to save the day, and not only did it not work but through the codebreaker's betrayal led to the situation getting a whole lot worse since that's how the First Order found the cloaked ships and killed 90% of the remaining resistance.  You can't solve all of your problems with moxie and a beeping robot is a lesson that took 8 movies to get to.

If Holdo planned to be on a suicide mission the whole time, which was clear from her goodbye scene with Leia, then why wait so long to lightspeed through the First Order ship?  You could have done that at any point, and certainly before 90% of the transports were destroyed.  That should have been your plan all along.  Although the First Order seemed to bounce right back based on the amount of firepower they landed on the Hoth lookalike so what was even the point?

The Jedi mind trick usually only works on weak minds.  Why did Kylo Ren fall for it so hard?  Is he a weak mind?  He's a whiny little manbaby but he's not been that specific sort of weak mind up to this point. 

People being able to survive in space is sort of implied in Star Wars since all of the big spaceships have an open hangar for the fighters and people walk around as if there is gravity and air to breathe, so that's all well and good, but Leia was blown out into the -455 degree, airless void of space and while unconscious uses the Force (has Leia ever used the Force before?  We learned in ROTJ that she is strong with it, but this feels like a heavy lift for her first documented use) to return to the ship?


I stand by my checklist opinion.  This movie has all of the elements of a Star Wars movie.  If you really like Star Wars, you will like it.  As a film in general, it's not great.

Using the conductor wasn't the codebreaking part of the plan. They needed the master codebreaker to crack the shields on the First Order's ship, not to open the door. Even beyond that, using Rose's pendant only opened the panel; there was evidently still a lot of hacking to do after the fact. As for why BB-8 couldn't have done it, that terminal was very much human-height, not droid-height.

Holdo's plan wasn't to take the First Order ship out with a suicide mission, it was to trick them into thinking that the Resistance was still on the command ship when it was blown up. Ideally, by this time, the transports would have reached the Crait base unnoticed, where they could wait things out and call for help. There wasn't any reason to attack the First Order head-on until they started firing on the transports, which they wouldn't have known about if DJ hadn't sold them out. Though it didn't destroy Snoke's command ship, this move by Holdo did at least allow the remaining transports to safely make it to the base.

As I Hated That Joke pointed out, Snoke wasn't using a mind trick- he was using the Force to bridge Kylo Ren's mind with Rey's, manipulating the two into falling into his trap.

The Leia thing is the most valid of these points because it's never actually addressed on-screen, but supposedly the official explanation is that Leia did begin Jedi training after ROTJ, but motherhood and her involvement in the New Republic kept her too busy to complete it. Also, Star Wars hangars aren't just open; the openings are covered by some sort of laser panel that lets ships through but effectively seals it off.