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Projects => The F Plus => Topic started by: Lemon on March 13, 2015, 10:03:19 am

Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Lemon on March 13, 2015, 10:03:19 am
(http://www.cuddleparty.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Cuddle-Party-logo-small.jpg)
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Navigator on March 13, 2015, 10:27:02 am
Holy shit. This is either going to make me vomit or be the best episode I ever listen to, because I got dragged to a cuddle party last year by a friend who didn't want to show up by herself.

It was the most annoyingly tedious thing I've ever been to. They scheduled 3 hours for the event, got started half an hour late, and then took an hour and a half to explain the rules. I appreciated their concern for safety (and I did feel safe), but I wound up just hanging out in the kitchen talking to people the whole time, because the "cuddle area" smelled like 20 people's socks.

I was most surprised by the demographics, though; I was easily one of the youngest people there (23), and the average age looked to be 35-40. There was also a distinct lack of tumblr grey-ace-special-snowflake bullshit, but I suppose that would require those people to leave their house.

I can't wait for this one to finish downloading.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: crow on March 13, 2015, 10:35:04 am
I'm mad you didn't use "Touch Me" by The Doors

Also, Smell the bag is my favorite Spinal Tap album
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: TheCrawlingChaos on March 13, 2015, 12:50:46 pm
OMG, work is going to be so much better now. Now where the fuck did I put my earbuds?
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: BomberJacket on March 13, 2015, 01:07:06 pm
So is STOG the Gleek of the F Plus Wondertwins?
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: boooo566 on March 13, 2015, 01:10:46 pm
You all scoffed at the cuddle hormone, but it's a useful thing!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1250936/Spray-version-cuddle-hormone-ease-symptoms-autism.html
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: positive stress on March 13, 2015, 01:42:29 pm
WAIT IS THIS A REAL THING? HOLY SHIT

I saw someone on tumblr talking about going to a cuddle party a while ago and I assumed they were joking. I can't believe cuddle parties are a real thing that really happens on my own planet. Holy shit
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: montrith on March 13, 2015, 01:45:09 pm
So is STOG the Gleek of the F Plus Wondertwins?
BomberJacket, March 13, 2015, 01:07:06 pm

I don't know about that, but since Portaxx is all about the animals I guess that makes me the one that can turn into a puddle of water.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Lemon on March 13, 2015, 01:49:02 pm

I guess we all learned a valuable lesson.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: LINDA on March 13, 2015, 02:04:23 pm
Glad to hear montrith again!
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Nyarai on March 13, 2015, 03:18:28 pm
In the Ace episode (#70), Lemon mentioned how the 'You Might be Asexual' list was "turning into some weird cuddle party shit." Now that I've seen it, it's even weirder than I imagined.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: RedMinjo on March 13, 2015, 04:18:34 pm
I'm mad you didn't use "Touch Me" by The Doors.
Smoking Crow, March 13, 2015, 10:35:04 am

Came here to post this.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Navigator on March 13, 2015, 04:21:30 pm
Finished the episode and I somehow forgot about Reid Mihalko's Cow Exercise. Basically everyone gets on the floor in a big circle and gets on their hands and knees, and then they sway back and forth while mooing until they all fall to one side-on top of each other.

My friend and I watched this from the sidelines, and if she hadn't refused to leave, I'd have bolted as soon as I saw that. (This is the same chick who tried to take me to a vaginal fisting workshop a month later. I've since stopped talking to her.)
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Fatty Bo Batty on March 13, 2015, 04:42:24 pm
I think I figured out why this concept makes me feel so angry and confused. It's the same level of stupidity the waifu freaks have.

The complete misunderstanding of human intimacy and social interaction, mixed with a "I'm never wrong" attitude just creates this irritating environment. They all sound like Martians, convincing themselves that they understand feelings.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Goose Goose Honk At Me Now on March 13, 2015, 04:48:12 pm
I feel like I should change my name now that I've listened to this episode.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Isfahan on March 13, 2015, 04:48:41 pm
Squid tentacles would only provide even more cuddle output!
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Goose Goose Honk At Me Now on March 13, 2015, 04:52:36 pm
Squid tentacles would only provide even more cuddle output!
Isfahan, March 13, 2015, 04:48:41 pm
Some squids do have elbows! Which clearly serve no evolutionary purpose but hugging, obviously.

Squids are clearly ahead of the curve, though, since they don't have undersea cuddle parties.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: crow on March 13, 2015, 04:55:25 pm
I think I figured out why this concept makes me feel so angry and confused. It's the same level of stupidity the waifu freaks have.

The complete misunderstanding of human intimacy and social interaction, mixed with a "I'm never wrong" attitude just creates this irritating environment. They all sound like Martians, convincing themselves that they understand feelings.
FattyBoBatty, March 13, 2015, 04:42:24 pm

I would rather live with a waifu connoisseur than spend a minute at a cuddle party
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: count_actuala on March 13, 2015, 05:02:29 pm
This is by no means an in for sweaty guys who smell like stale candy corn to grind their boners into the small of your back while everyone watches Adventure Time.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: chai tea latte on March 13, 2015, 06:00:44 pm
This is by no means an in for sweaty guys who smell like stale candy corn to grind their boners into the small of your back while everyone watches Adventure Time.
count_actuala, March 13, 2015, 05:02:29 pm

this except the one i went to had an a/v issue so we watched Miss Representation, a sad documentary about misogyny
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Ambious on March 13, 2015, 06:33:23 pm
#NotAllFacilitators
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Isfahan on March 13, 2015, 07:05:03 pm
If there's one thing that's reassuring when at a get-together, it's a long and reiterative preamble on how you're not going to be sexually assaulted.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: SATAN MILKSHAKE on March 13, 2015, 07:22:24 pm
I don't think I'm alone in the Christian Domestic Discipline vibes I got from these guys.  Not just in their shared language of "let's take things back to an earlier time, when things were happier" but in their intense, focused insistence that this isn't weird, and people who think it's weird are wrong, and if you just tried it you'd understand.

Some other people have mentioned just how creepy it made them feel, and it's a weird contrast to something like the F-list episode, which by every objective standard is so much more viscerally gross.  It's not just the absurdity, it's that no one on that site was trying to argue that it was entirely normal and not weird at all that they're into Demonic Cum.  That's what makes this episode and the CDD one so creepy and weird: the constant insistence that no, it's not weird, it's not a sex thing, this is what people really need in order to feel fulfilled.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: KingKalamari on March 13, 2015, 07:59:01 pm
To paraphrase an earlier episode: These are people who aren't having sex but everyone wishes they were.

Seriously, I think this shit would be way less creepy if it were just a mass orgy...
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: count_actuala on March 13, 2015, 09:05:21 pm
Seriously, I think this shit would be way less creepy if it were just a mass orgy...
KingKalamari, March 13, 2015, 07:59:01 pm
This is so spot on. For me, and I think for a lot of people, the episodes that focus on deviant sexuality are way less creepy than the ones that focus on people trying to convince each other they're not interested in even conventional sexuality. Shit like the stuffed animal fuckers rides the line because I think at the core it's the fact that they're layering so much bullshit over what they're after.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Bobalay on March 13, 2015, 09:06:39 pm
I bet there's some of them who just want to softly whisper "mommy" the whole time.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: advancedclass on March 13, 2015, 10:40:00 pm
I feel like I should change my name now that I've listened to this episode.
Cuddlesquid with a caramel center, March 13, 2015, 04:48:12 pm

Have you considered "Boundarysquid" or "Touchsquid"?

Personally, I have never been so happy to hear a list of Canadian provinces that didn't feature my own. This was some creepy ass shit and I'm glad there's some distance between weird cuddle hubs and me. Although I'm flanked my provinces with cuddleparties which means in a way my province is getting geographically cuddled. Ugh. I don't know if Montrith and Portaxx should be banned from collaborating on future documents or should always work together for maximum horrible. Good? work, guys.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: crow on March 14, 2015, 12:16:21 am
So I opened up a private browser and searched for Minnesota cuddle parties, and although cuddleparty.com had no listings, there are a disturbingly high number of other results.
Meetup.com is kind enough to show me what other groups these people are a part of and it's exactly what you'd expect.

Twin Cities Christian Singles.
Nerds At Heart Twin Cities Singles Group.
Twin Sum Drum (hand drummers, spectators, and dancers are welcome)
MNPoly (with 676 polyamorous members, and the organizer looks about as creepy as he should)
The Minneapolis Meditation Meetup Group
Singles & Single Parents Christian Fellowship
Minneapolis Tantra Meetup Getup
MinnSpec -- Minnesota Speculative Fiction Writers
Minnesota Skeptics
And more of the same.

I feel like there's a doc to be made here.
Mique, March 14, 2015, 12:05:55 am

I feel like there's an odd couple sitcom
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: A Meat on March 14, 2015, 05:50:32 am
So uh, since when has dry humping been considered as non sexual?

Also, fuck, there's a cuddle party happening today about 15 minutes away from where I live, six hours from now. I probably shouldn't have checked whether this exists in my country. On the other hand, it seems to be organized by some sort of spiritualist tantric sexual healing group thing, as a sort of non-sexual introductory thing to the tantric sex courses?

I'm even more confused now.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Cat Planet on March 14, 2015, 09:17:21 am
Somebody should introduce the cousin guy to the Cockrub Warrior. He is also "not gay".
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: SATAN MILKSHAKE on March 14, 2015, 01:37:23 pm
So uh, since when has dry humping been considered as non sexual?

Also, fuck, there's a cuddle party happening today about 15 minutes away from where I live, six hours from now. I probably shouldn't have checked whether this exists in my country. On the other hand, it seems to be organized by some sort of spiritualist tantric sexual healing group thing, as a sort of non-sexual introductory thing to the tantric sex courses?

I'm even more confused now.
A Meat, March 14, 2015, 05:50:32 am

Honestly, that makes it feel better.  It's still tantric sexual healing group-weird, but having a cuddle party explicitly as foreplay removes a layer of the uncomfortable IT'S NOT SEXUAL stuff.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: KingKalamari on March 14, 2015, 01:43:30 pm
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Bobguinary Novel on March 14, 2015, 02:59:52 pm
Cuddle parties just feel like a complex group ritual to summon a Lovecraftian being, but instead of an orgy of murder and sex climaxing into summoning Satan, its flooding a room with BO and repression to summon the Arch Demon of Awkward. It was so uncomfortable to even listen to these stories.

It was amazing to hear Brak again, though.

Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Cat Planet on March 14, 2015, 03:09:14 pm
I like how SA goons are accusing Lemon of demonizing cuddle parties.

I'm creeped out the other way. The people running the event spell out very carefully that it's not about sex, they spell out their policy of consent, but the readers keep insisting over and over it's all about non-consensual touching and sex. It creeps me out when people are so bound to their own interpretation that they'll somehow turn even the clearest indications around in their head to conform to their bias.

Why would anyone think that a room full of fully clothed adults rubbing up against each other is weird. Such bias in this world.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Puppy Time on March 14, 2015, 03:12:35 pm
I like how SA goons are accusing Lemon of demonizing cuddle parties.

I'm creeped out the other way. The people running the event spell out very carefully that it's not about sex, they spell out their policy of consent, but the readers keep insisting over and over it's all about non-consensual touching and sex. It creeps me out when people are so bound to their own interpretation that they'll somehow turn even the clearest indications around in their head to conform to their bias.
Cat Planet, March 14, 2015, 03:09:14 pm

TBF, I think it's just the one goon and everyone else is arguing him down, making fun of him, or making some other dumb criticism.  Or making Stog puns.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Cat Planet on March 14, 2015, 03:23:00 pm
I'd say that this community is pretty unique - usually awkward and broken people spend their time in furry ERP chat rooms rather than meet face to face.

Also, kind of a minor nitpick, but oxytocin IS released during cuddling or when being caressed. I remember my dad teaching me to always caress a woman's back after sex because that releases the hormone in question, haha.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Goose Goose Honk At Me Now on March 14, 2015, 03:33:06 pm
I remember my dad teaching me to always caress a woman's back after sex because that releases the hormone in question, haha.
Cat Planet, March 14, 2015, 03:23:00 pm

Every mug in your father's possession had better read "#1 Dad".
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: QueenSyreen on March 14, 2015, 05:05:02 pm
I had a friend once who thought these groups sounded interesting, so to my surprise, I've actually heard of this shit before. But while she is a trusting friendly diamond, I saw a website for this stuff and said, not if my choice was between this and death. I will gladly spend hours on the couch with my girlfriend, but the operative word in that sentence is girlfriend. We are two people with an emotional connection to one another and the physical contact fucking means something.

I think the people who were trying to figure out why on earth they would like cuddling people of the gender they were attracted to more than other people if this was so very non-sexual really said something about this episode, and  about how far these people are removed from the reality of the situation. Obviously your own preferences and your own freaking LIFE plays into how touching another person feels to you. You can't trick your body into feeling great cause you've had a cuddle prostitution hour with a stranger, dudes, if you get a chemical rush from hugging someone, there's a reason, and the reason goes a bit deeper than 'push button get oxytocin.' Or, well, personally, I think it should. It hurts me when the generic f plus whackjob is SO CLOSE to the truth but understanding the truth would violate one of their unalterable cult beliefs. And therefore, we get more nutty permutations of unalterable cult beliefs warped to make a nice little circle around the truth that gets close, kind of, if you're already a bit confused and looking for anything resembling reality to cling to.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Isfahan on March 14, 2015, 05:42:01 pm
It hurts me when the generic f plus whackjob is SO CLOSE to the truth but understanding the truth would violate one of their unalterable cult beliefs.QueenSyreen, March 14, 2015, 05:05:02 pm

We've seen this an absolute ton in the episodes so far, haven't we? This, and people who you can sort of tell deep down KNOW the truth, but choose to keep up the emperor's-clothes charade in their head out of a sense of community and a belief that they must be the only one who's not quite getting it.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Down10 on March 14, 2015, 11:32:02 pm
It hurts me when the generic f plus whackjob is SO CLOSE to the truth but understanding the truth would violate one of their unalterable cult beliefs.QueenSyreen, March 14, 2015, 05:05:02 pm

We've seen this an absolute ton in the episodes so far, haven't we? This, and people who you can sort of tell deep down KNOW the truth, but choose to keep up the emperor's-clothes charade in their head out of a sense of community and a belief that they must be the only one who's not quite getting it.Isfahan, March 14, 2015, 05:42:01 pm
The sense of denial is flamingly obvious — that adults could cuddle but absolutely not have it lead to sexual arousal. It's these mile-long list of rules and boundaries set up to ensure no hanky-panky goes on under the blanky that are absurd. I agree with the posters above that if these cuddly parties broke out into orgies, it would be LESS weird, because the logic of sensual touch leading to sex is a normal, natural thing. The need for so many rules and clarifications and set limits — it's putting up walls, not breaking them down, as they would have us believe.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: AlbieQuirky on March 20, 2015, 02:54:13 am
I don't know about the queen of stuffed animals lady, but Reid Mihalko is a polyamory evangelist who does sex workshops and what-not. He appeared on the terrible reality TV show "Miss Advised" a couple of years ago, and freaked out one of the principal characters---a woman who has a creepy podcast about sex called "Sex With Emily". At one point, he asks Emily to be his partner for some kind of French-kissing workshop and holy shit it redefines creepy. He starts twitching, and it's just nauseating, and then he tells her he gets twitchy when he's aroused.

tl;dr: cuddle party dude is also creepy sex dude who looks like Gary Busey
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: A sphere with points on March 21, 2015, 12:36:22 pm
This episode exemplifies a big internet pet peeve of mine - idiot nerds trying to intellectualize everything they like.

It cannot be that they like spooning because they're lonesome and it gives them a boner.  That's, ugh, so mundane, so typical.  As a learned individual, I can tell you the reason I enjoy spooning is because there is actually a complex biochemical process occurring which results from years of mother neglecting my innate biological, psychological and emotional blah blah blah
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Victor Laszlo on March 21, 2015, 04:21:38 pm
This episode exemplifies a big internet pet peeve of mine - idiot nerds trying to intellectualize everything they like.

It cannot be that they like spooning because they're lonesome and it gives them a boner.  That's, ugh, so mundane, so typical.  As a learned individual, I can tell you the reason I enjoy spooning is because there is actually a complex biochemical process occurring which results from years of mother neglecting my innate biological, psychological and emotional blah blah blah
A sphere with points, March 21, 2015, 12:36:22 pm
You just can't appreciate having a boner on the same level that they do.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Old_Zircon on March 22, 2015, 04:36:11 pm
About 8 years ago a friend of mine told me about the time she somehow managed to get an invitation to a secret, invite-only, underground REAL VAMPIRES party, where about 150 REAL VAMPIRES gathered in a big basement someplace in Brooklyn to do vampire stuff for about 20 hours.

Cuddle parties sound so much worse on all levels.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: crow on March 22, 2015, 04:53:25 pm
About 8 years ago a friend of mine told me about the time she somehow managed to get an invitation to a secret, invite-only, underground REAL VAMPIRES party, where about 150 REAL VAMPIRES gathered in a big basement someplace in Brooklyn to do vampire stuff for about 20 hours.

Cuddle parties sound so much worse on all levels.
Old_Zircon, March 22, 2015, 04:36:11 pm

Your friend got invited to an orgy
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: count_actuala on March 22, 2015, 05:25:34 pm
As a real vampire, I can confirm this.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: SATAN MILKSHAKE on March 22, 2015, 06:32:21 pm
I dunno, I think I'd get better stories from the vampire orgy than the cuddle party.  REAL VAMPIRES sounds like they'd be more interesting to be uncomfortable with than PEOPLE WHO SIGN UP FOR CUDDLE PARTIES.

e: I wouldn't want either of these situations because I'm not a masochist but if it was the lesser of two evils I'd have to pick vampires
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Bobguinary Novel on March 22, 2015, 09:31:18 pm
About 8 years ago a friend of mine told me about the time she somehow managed to get an invitation to a secret, invite-only, underground REAL VAMPIRES party, where about 150 REAL VAMPIRES gathered in a big basement someplace in Brooklyn to do vampire stuff for about 20 hours.

Cuddle parties sound so much worse on all levels.
Old_Zircon, March 22, 2015, 04:36:11 pm

So when is this going to be an episode?
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Old_Zircon on March 22, 2015, 10:16:45 pm
You all scoffed at the cuddle hormone, but it's a useful thing!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1250936/Spray-version-cuddle-hormone-ease-symptoms-autism.html
moooo566, March 13, 2015, 01:10:46 pm

Interesting.  On the other hand

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21429671 (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21429671)

The evidence shows that intranasal oxytocin: (1) produces no detectable subjective changes in recipients, (2) produces no reliable side-effects, and (3) is not associated with adverse outcomes when delivered in doses of 18-40 IU for short term use in controlled research settings. Future research directions should include a focus on the dosage and duration of use, and application with younger age groups, vulnerable populations, and with females.
EDIT:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3539865/ (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3539865/)

Results

Although no significant changes were detected in the primary outcome measures after correcting for baseline differences, results suggested improvements after 6 weeks in measures of social cognition (Reading-the-Mind-in-the-Eyes Test, p = 0.002, d = 1.2), and quality of life (World Health Organization Quality of Life Questionnaire – emotion, p = 0.031, d = 0.84), both secondary measures. Oxytocin was well tolerated and no serious adverse effects were reported.

Apparently this stuff is completely unregulated and sells on Amazon for like $30 a bottle as a "pheromone to attract women."

We live in weird times.


LAST EDIT:  in the process of googling this, I discovered a forum for "pheromone enthusiasts" that might be worth digging through; I'm busy with Quora right now and I'll probably start digging in worlddreambank.org after that, though, so I'm not going to get around to it any time soon myself.  http://pherotruth.com/ (http://pherotruth.com/)
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Old_Zircon on March 22, 2015, 10:28:41 pm
I don't remember much of the story but the gist of it was that the REAL VAMPIRE party was pretty much a giant S&M/bloodplay/sex orgy and EBM DJ set.  Sounds pretty awkward to attend if that wasn't your thing, but still way better than a cuddle party. And I've definitely got a soft spot for oldschool, 80s EBM.

EDIT:
smoking crow already called it and it's pretty obvious, but the fact that it was a VAMPIRE ORGY and that she was attending not because she wanted to go to an orgy or was a REAL VAMPIRE, but because a goth she knew offered to get her in and it was one of those things were if you have a chance to attend a vampire orgy you might as well.  Plus she probably got tons of free drugs.

Come to think of it, I did sit next to a REAL VAMPIRE for most of a term in one class back in college, she was OK all things considered, and surprisingly ungoth - just anemic looking and manic, kind of like a really sickly Amelie if anything.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: crow on March 23, 2015, 01:38:04 am
And I've definitely got a soft spot for oldschool, 80s EBM.
Old_Zircon, March 22, 2015, 10:28:41 pm

Me too but blood play is fucking nasty and a fantastic way to get hepatitis
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Old_Zircon on March 23, 2015, 12:51:49 pm
And I've definitely got a soft spot for oldschool, 80s EBM.
Old_Zircon, March 22, 2015, 10:28:41 pm

Me too but blood play is fucking nasty and a fantastic way to get hepatitis
Smoking Crow, March 23, 2015, 01:38:04 am

Definitely. She was there merely as an observer.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Tiny Prancer on March 25, 2015, 01:58:03 am
I finally listened to this episode today and there was a throwaway line Portaxx said at the end that I heard and instantly knew I had to draw.

NSFW content. Click to show.

this is in my brand new sketchbook forever now. I have taped a piece of paper that says "don't look this is terrible" over it.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Bobguinary Novel on March 27, 2015, 06:57:23 pm
But now you won't have that feeling that you're fucking up a sketchbook with shitty drawings, because after dickwing dolphin, everything is drawing gold.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Tiny Prancer on March 28, 2015, 12:41:05 am
that is honestly a genuinely good point
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: crow on March 28, 2015, 01:43:05 am
that is honestly a genuinely good point
Tiny Prancer, March 28, 2015, 12:41:05 am

No because everything you have and will ever draw will never reach the level of perfection that dick dolphin exists at
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Goose Goose Honk At Me Now on March 28, 2015, 09:12:35 am
I had occasion to look up Cuddlr, the Tinder/Grindr cuddle-wannabe, on Wikipedia.

Turns out they shut down on March 16th.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Tiny Prancer on March 28, 2015, 04:08:11 pm
that is honestly a genuinely good point
Tiny Prancer, March 28, 2015, 12:41:05 am

No because everything you have and will ever draw will never reach the level of perfection that dick dolphin exists at
Smoking Crow, March 28, 2015, 01:43:05 am

I can accept this
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Cat Planet on April 08, 2015, 05:56:39 pm
http://nymag.com/thecut/2015/04/creepy-serial-cuddler-has-spooned-10000-victims.html

Fine isn't spooning with the intent of having sex. “Sex is like a chore, a routine," he explained. "It’s like going to the dentist.” Instead, he's developed brand-new snuggle moves that sound both nightmarish and difficult to escape — e.g., the "cuddle doggy style," where a "woman raises up on all fours while he wraps himself around her holding and rocking her." He only cuddles women, some of whom he meets at "cuddle parties" (others, he claims, seek out his services).
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: crow on April 08, 2015, 06:36:17 pm
I have to say, this episode made me wretch more than any other.  I felt nauseous with dick-bugs, but this one horrified me on a psychological level.  Have I been cuddled without me knowing in the past?  Is cuddling a part of the human psyche that is not meant to be seen?

I have gazed into the abyss, and it posts on reddit
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Old_Zircon on April 19, 2015, 01:57:04 pm
I tried this too, and surprisingly I didn't find any cuddle parties for Rhode Island (I'd be shocked if there weren't any - it IS Rhode Island after all - but maybe they're word of mout) but I did find this:

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/RICGUY226 (http://www.okcupid.com/profile/RICGUY226)

So I opened up a private browser and searched for Minnesota cuddle parties, and although cuddleparty.com had no listings, there are a disturbingly high number of other results.
Meetup.com is kind enough to show me what other groups these people are a part of and it's exactly what you'd expect.

Twin Cities Christian Singles.
Nerds At Heart Twin Cities Singles Group.
Twin Sum Drum (hand drummers, spectators, and dancers are welcome)
MNPoly (with 676 polyamorous members, and the organizer looks about as creepy as he should)
The Minneapolis Meditation Meetup Group
Singles & Single Parents Christian Fellowship
Minneapolis Tantra Meetup Getup
MinnSpec -- Minnesota Speculative Fiction Writers
Minnesota Skeptics
And more of the same.

I feel like there's a doc to be made here.
Mique, March 14, 2015, 12:05:55 am
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: advancedclass on April 29, 2015, 11:13:14 am
At the time this episode was first aired, I was delighted my province wasn't mentioned in the list of Canadian Cuddle Party Locations.

Since then, a friend and fellow F Plus listener in the city has advised me that her place of work got a cuddle party brochure in the mail. Why would anyone do this?
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Old_Zircon on May 03, 2015, 11:06:02 am
At the time this episode was first aired, I was delighted my province wasn't mentioned in the list of Canadian Cuddle Party Locations.

Since then, a friend and fellow F Plus listener in the city has advised me that her place of work got a cuddle party brochure in the mail. Why would anyone do this?
advancedclass, April 29, 2015, 11:13:14 am

Think you could get a photo or scan of that?  I want to see what a cuddle party direct-mail campaign looks like.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: advancedclass on May 03, 2015, 01:57:59 pm
At the time this episode was first aired, I was delighted my province wasn't mentioned in the list of Canadian Cuddle Party Locations.

Since then, a friend and fellow F Plus listener in the city has advised me that her place of work got a cuddle party brochure in the mail. Why would anyone do this?
advancedclass, April 29, 2015, 11:13:14 am

Think you could get a photo or scan of that?  I want to see what a cuddle party direct-mail campaign looks like.
Old_Zircon, May 03, 2015, 11:06:02 am

Dammit I just asked, and it looks like I misremembered. It was a radio ad for a cuddle party. I think I got confused because around the same time her store got an envelope full of Chick Tracts and conflated the two events. I apologize for raising your hopes, Zircon: cuddle partiers have not progressed to direct-mail campaigns.

Yet.

They're still in my area, though.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Isfahan on May 03, 2015, 07:14:43 pm
A radio ad? That's still pretty mainstream a method. I'd probably grimace at my radio if I heard a cuddle-party ad while driving.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Digital Walnut on May 03, 2015, 11:39:07 pm
"This episode of On the Media was underwritten by The Cuddlery: get into a bubble of affection with... holy shit, am I actually supposed to read this on air? Fuck you guys."
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: STOG on May 04, 2015, 04:59:41 am
"This episode of On the Media was underwritten by The Cuddlery: get into a bubble of affection with... holy shit, am I actually supposed to read this on air? Fuck you guys."
Digital Walnut, May 03, 2015, 11:39:07 pm

"Radiolab is supported by listeners like you and Cuddleparty.com, where... what... oh JESUS CHRIST, THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE THROWN AD COPY ACROSS THE ROOM. FUCK YOU."
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Digital Walnut on May 04, 2015, 01:57:14 pm
The Cuddlery has a video ad, too. It's like someone paid their yoga class to remake a scene from Twilight.
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: AgentCoop on May 04, 2015, 02:08:51 pm
A single tear runs down Terry Gross's face as she's forced to shill out this bizarre grope-orgy
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: goombapolice on August 27, 2015, 04:41:23 pm
I noticed the title for this one changed?
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Lemon on August 27, 2015, 07:47:16 pm
Sure has!
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: LaserSeusan on August 27, 2015, 08:27:20 pm
I'd like to bring back an idea from an earlier episode, and suggest a google maps add-on that avoids taking you anywhere near where these cuddle parties happen.

My friend and I watched this from the sidelines, and if she hadn't refused to leave, I'd have bolted as soon as I saw that. (This is the same chick who tried to take me to a vaginal fisting workshop a month later. I've since stopped talking to her.)
Navigator, March 13, 2015, 04:21:30 pm

And I thought I hung out with freaks...
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Shigan on August 29, 2015, 04:57:22 am
I noticed the title for this one changed?
goombapolice, August 27, 2015, 04:41:23 pm

But "Eee! Pinions!" is still hasn't...
Title: Episode 169: I Would Cuddle You So Hard
Post by: Boots Raingear on August 29, 2015, 06:33:34 am
But "Eee! Pinions!" is still hasn't...
Shigan, August 29, 2015, 04:57:22 am

I am kind of in love with how awful that one is.
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: ThatsMyFetish on August 30, 2015, 12:31:18 pm
Tried googling this weird phenomenon in my country and luckily it only popped up once, at some religious festival in a different town. But the google maps add-on for marking these sorts of events is a great ideal fantasy. Note, here it's considered uncomfortable and rude to stand closer than 3 feet from someone, 5 feet is the usual interaction, cuddle-parties sounds extremely disturbing and makes it difficult to NOT imagine it being foreplay to a giant orgie.
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: STOG on August 30, 2015, 12:58:29 pm
Just gonna post this while the thread's still alive.

(https://cdn.evbuc.com/eventlogos/16495185/opccuddleparty.jpg)
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Isfahan on August 30, 2015, 04:14:18 pm
Just gonna post this while the thread's still alive.

(https://cdn.evbuc.com/eventlogos/16495185/opccuddleparty.jpg)
STOG, August 30, 2015, 12:58:29 pm

Mr. Veaux would fit right in making PowerPoint slides for the Department of Defense (http://msnbcmedia.msn.com/i/MSNBC/Components/Photo/2009/December/091202/091203-engel-big-9a.jpg).
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Cyberventurer on August 30, 2015, 09:23:28 pm
That picture looks like when you lose a game of Tetris.
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Lemon on August 31, 2015, 09:46:10 am
Franklin has quite an eye for graphic design. Just look at the game he created! (http://www.symtoys.com/onyx.html) (LINK NSFW)
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: STOG on August 31, 2015, 10:40:25 am
Franklin has quite an eye for graphic design. Just look at the game he created! (http://www.symtoys.com/onyx.html) (LINK NSFW)
Lemon, August 31, 2015, 09:46:10 am

When I think of a kinky night, I also think of the game Monopoly!
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: ThatsMyFetish on August 31, 2015, 12:08:48 pm
for those who love vengeful, angry love-making.
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: montrith on August 31, 2015, 02:37:20 pm
Franklin has quite an eye for graphic design. Just look at the game he created! (http://www.symtoys.com/onyx.html) (LINK NSFW)
Lemon, August 31, 2015, 09:46:10 am

They also have anonymous sexual fantasy confessions!

A true story from what happen and I started dating my girl

A True Spanking Contest

Bill was just getting out of computer class and when the two girls approach him.
Bill: Hey, if it isn’t the competitive adrenaline girls themselves in the flesh!
Jill: Hey, Bill, we need your help with something.
Sam: Yeah, but we need your strict confidentiality and we are only asking you because you are the only one who we can both decide we can trust.
Jill: Its the opportunity of a life time for you but you can only trust you and only you.
Bill: I take it has to do with another competition you two conjured up again, some new adrenaline rush and another bet too.
Jill: See, he knows us all too well.
Bill: Well, this past summer, Sam father paid for Sky diving and scuba diving together and bet on who could swim to the closes to the biggest fish you can find. So what is it now, rattlesnake hunting and who is more fearless.
Sam: No sky diving was the fear bet. This time its a pain test. Whoever has the will power to take the most pain wins! We came up with the best and only way, and that where you come in.
Bill: I’m not sure what that could be but why don’t we talk about this at Starbucks, we can meet at the one down on Lincoln Boulevard across from the north campus at 3pm after my math class.
Jill: See you than!
Sam: Works for me, see in a few hours.
A few hours later, they meet at Starbucks. The girls got there first and got the most remote outside table. Bill showed, got his coffee and sat down.
Bill: Ok, what this about girls you were pretty cryptic about this bet on who has the most will power and something about pain tolerance?
Jill: We got a bet going about who can take the most pain without giving in or interfering. After many hours talking about we decided the only safe way to do that is with a spanking. Whoever can take the most, hardest and longest wins!
Sam: We thought about spanking each other but we decided that the only way for it to be fair is for someone else does it and we choose you.


Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Lemon on August 31, 2015, 05:29:24 pm
Jesus.

Is there a doc in this? I think it might be fun to pretend to play this shitty game live.
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Glitterbomber on August 31, 2015, 10:46:20 pm
You have to play it
Title: Episode 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: goombapolice on September 04, 2015, 11:43:55 am
I wonder how long that mess of a graph took to make
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Is It Normal this Disgusting Giant Sherman Tank on November 03, 2015, 01:24:36 am
I like how this was the episode that broke Montrith. There's something so stereotypically Scandinavian about getting freaked out by physical contact with other people.

That being said, holy shit are these people creepy and pathetic as shit.
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Caroline on September 20, 2016, 03:30:52 pm
A professional cuddler gives an interview:

http://www.chicagoreader.com/Bleader/archives/2016/01/06/embrace-the-life-of-a-professional-cuddlerspooning-massages-awkward-erections-and-all

"So far it's been all men except for one female friend. Mostly guys over 50."
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Is It Normal this Disgusting Giant Sherman Tank on September 29, 2016, 07:19:42 pm
A professional cuddler gives an interview:

http://www.chicagoreader.com/Bleader/archives/2016/01/06/embrace-the-life-of-a-professional-cuddlerspooning-massages-awkward-erections-and-all

"So far it's been all men except for one female friend. Mostly guys over 50."
Caroline, September 20, 2016, 03:30:52 pm

The guys over 50 part is strange, although I'm going to be charitable and assume they're recent widowers who are having trouble getting used to being alone.
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Carbon on September 29, 2016, 09:17:58 pm
I like how indefatigably they say it's not sexual and then one of the tags is "sex".
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Peartee on May 11, 2017, 02:00:09 am
After I've found the F plus podcast I've been steadily going through the backlog of episodes, and I've never felt such a strong kinship to the readers as I felt for Montrith, when she was closing dread in her discomfort for the whole concept of cuddleparties.

Torilla tavataan.
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Theta on February 12, 2018, 07:22:27 pm
https://www.vice.com/en_uk/article/5gjx5k/can-paid-cuddling-ever-be-truly-platonic

Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Is It Normal this Disgusting Giant Sherman Tank on February 12, 2018, 07:37:41 pm
https://www.vice.com/en_uk/article/5gjx5k/can-paid-cuddling-ever-be-truly-platonic
Theta, February 12, 2018, 07:22:27 pm

I'm going to guess that this article isn't just the word NO written in a very large font.
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: LaserSeusan on February 13, 2018, 08:30:15 am
https://www.vice.com/en_uk/article/5gjx5k/can-paid-cuddling-ever-be-truly-platonic
Theta, February 12, 2018, 07:22:27 pm

One of the FAQ answers reads: "Think of this like making out with your girlfriend, only this is not your girlfriend, and no making out is allowed."

I tried to see if the rest of their FAQ is just as weird, but Cuddle Time seems to have taken their site down. Did manage to find way too many other sites with their own FAQs though:

Q: I’m afraid I might cry. Is that ok?
A: Yes, absolutely. Please allow yourself to – it can feel amazing to cry while you’re being held.

Q: What is your policy regarding hygiene?
A: We ask that you shower and brush your teeth before the appointment. We also ask that you avoid perfume and cologne. Our cuddlers will be doing the same. If you request them to wear a specific scent, let them know before the session, and obtain that bottle of perfume, cologne, etc for them.

Q: What about “natural reactions?”
A: Due to the family oriented interactions we strive for, this is rare. From time to time this may happen though. If this does happen we ask you to shift your body or change poses so that it does not become a focus of the session and so any physical arousal is not in contact with your cuddler. We are great at being the “big spoon.
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Sham bam bamina! on May 04, 2018, 01:11:33 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/hUSRvoz.jpg)
Title: 169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everyone In This Room
Post by: Neal on July 24, 2019, 10:11:58 am
(https://i.imgur.com/qzhb92l.png)