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Topic: I found my old cringe writing.  (Read 1000 times)

Commander_Xephy

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I found my old cringe writing.
I was doing some computer cleanup (which I only do when I get ready to upgrade my PC components) and I found a folder called "why does this exist". Being the curious mouse I am, I decided to poke my nose into that folder and find out exactly why I sounded like I was having my midlife crisis when I named the folder. I will provide an example of this to you, and you're welcome to provide your own!! :)

Title: Temari and Gaara's Weird talk show [write date: 1/30/2007] (For context, I was twelve when I wrote this.)

Temari: Welcome to my talk show, starring me!
Gaara:-_-
Temari: Oops! And Gaara is, too. Anyway, we have Naruto ans Sasuke on our show today!!
Sasuke: Why did you drag me here?!?
Naruto: Because, we have to let all of Kohona know our secret.
Gaara: Naruto, do you have something you want all of Kohona to hear?
Naruto: Yeah!!! Sasuke and I are going out!!!
Audience:O.O *pukes in paper bags*
Gaara and Temari: -_- ... O.O
Naruto and Sasuke ignore everyone and make out
Temari: Guys! You’re on live television!!
Sasuke: So? Who cares?
Audience: *raises hands*
Gaara: Anyway, why are you guys going out all of a sudden?
Naruto: Because, Sasuke's hot!!!!!!!!
Sasuke: Because Naruto needed me to live an ordinary life.
Temari: *gagging* to make me sick.
Audience: *gagging*
Gaara: O.O O.O O.O -_- -_- -_-
Temari: Lets close this episode of the show!
Gaara: Good idea!
Naruto ans Sasuke start making out
Temari and Gaara try to seperate the gay
auaurorau Dr. Buttplug Salubrious Rex Frank West SHAMBA~1.SBB

chai tea latte

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I found my old cringe writing. #1
Bless up, and thanks for sharing
Dr. Buttplug

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I found my old cringe writing. #2
(4th grade)
Amebas & Humans
A compare and contrast report


Humans are highly evolved. They are multi-cellular. They have hair. They are animals. They are very smart. They eat Pizza Hut pizza. They wear clothes, breathe, have many senses and are large.

Amebas are very un-evolved. They are mono-cellular. They have no hair. They are also animals. They eat Protozoa Hut protozoa. They have no clothes and don't breathe. They have very few senses and are Smaller than this period..
Salubrious Rex Hux Antivehicular auaurorau Dr. Buttplug chai tea latte Commander_Xephy Frank West positive stress SHAMBA~1.SBB

Hux

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I found my old cringe writing. #3
(4th grade)
Amebas & Humans
A compare and contrast report


Humans are highly evolved. They are multi-cellular. They have hair. They are animals. They are very smart. They eat Pizza Hut pizza. They wear clothes, breathe, have many senses and are large.

Amebas are very un-evolved. They are mono-cellular. They have no hair. They are also animals. They eat Protozoa Hut protozoa. They have no clothes and don't breathe. They have very few senses and are Smaller than this period..
THE CURSE OF THE WITCH OF THE MUMMY'S TOMB, August 12, 2020, 11:56:48 pm

this is so fucking funny, oh my god.
it makes me want to find some of my old writing and transcribe it here.

Antivehicular

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I found my old cringe writing. #4
(4th grade)
Amebas & Humans
A compare and contrast report


Humans are highly evolved. They are multi-cellular. They have hair. They are animals. They are very smart. They eat Pizza Hut pizza. They wear clothes, breathe, have many senses and are large.

Amebas are very un-evolved. They are mono-cellular. They have no hair. They are also animals. They eat Protozoa Hut protozoa. They have no clothes and don't breathe. They have very few senses and are Smaller than this period..
THE CURSE OF THE WITCH OF THE MUMMY'S TOMB, August 12, 2020, 11:56:48 pm

goddamn, I could go for some Protozoa Hut right now

Hux

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I found my old cringe writing. #5
grade 5:



grade 8:



i think i'm going to make a separate thread for my old art and writing because it's a fucking trip, like an actual saga. i'm so glad that i have everything i have ever made stored away in my closet.
Salubrious Rex Dr. Buttplug

Blandest

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I found my old cringe writing. #6
grade 5:



grade 8:



i think i'm going to make a separate thread for my old art and writing because it's a fucking trip, like an actual saga. i'm so glad that i have everything i have ever made stored away in my closet.
Hux, August 13, 2020, 03:12:39 am

On the plus side, I can't draw that well and I am 29 so there's always a silver lining.
Hux

Hux

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I found my old cringe writing. #7
grade 5:



grade 8:



i think i'm going to make a separate thread for my old art and writing because it's a fucking trip, like an actual saga. i'm so glad that i have everything i have ever made stored away in my closet.
Hux, August 13, 2020, 03:12:39 am

On the plus side, I can't draw that well and I am 29 so there's always a silver lining.
Blandest, August 13, 2020, 04:09:15 pm

don't feel bad, the only person who can draw better than 9 year old me is 12 year old me.



why was i like this?
why am i still like this?
Salubrious Rex Secret Gaygent 69 Dragon Friend Frank West

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I found my old cringe writing. #8
grade 5:



grade 8:



i think i'm going to make a separate thread for my old art and writing because it's a fucking trip, like an actual saga. i'm so glad that i have everything i have ever made stored away in my closet.
Hux, August 13, 2020, 03:12:39 am

On the plus side, I can't draw that well and I am 29 so there's always a silver lining.
Blandest, August 13, 2020, 04:09:15 pm

don't feel bad, the only person who can draw better than 9 year old me is 12 year old me.



why was i like this?
why am i still like this?
Hux, August 13, 2020, 04:45:42 pm

this picture is fucking BLESSED
Dragon Friend

Commander_Xephy

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I found my old cringe writing. #9
grade 5:



grade 8:



i think i'm going to make a separate thread for my old art and writing because it's a fucking trip, like an actual saga. i'm so glad that i have everything i have ever made stored away in my closet.
Hux, August 13, 2020, 03:12:39 am

On the plus side, I can't draw that well and I am 29 so there's always a silver lining.
Blandest, August 13, 2020, 04:09:15 pm

don't feel bad, the only person who can draw better than 9 year old me is 12 year old me.



why was i like this?
why am i still like this?
Hux, August 13, 2020, 04:45:42 pm

this picture is fucking BLESSED
jack chick, August 13, 2020, 06:53:13 pm

Everything about this entire thread is beautiful.

Hux

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I found my old cringe writing. #10
8th grade, nearing the end of my OMG LOLZ SO RANDUM phase. i actually think that phase never ended now that i think about it.


i'm just going to keep posting this shit.
now this thread belongs to desmond the anthropomorphic crab.

5th grade, once again. yes i've had a lifelong battle with anger issues, how could you tell?

jacklemore & ryan lewis

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I found my old cringe writing. #11
paging shell game for anthropomorphic crab review. shell game please report to the white courtesy telephone.
Hux Seth "Slimy" Rollins

Blandest

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I found my old cringe writing. #12
As a sincere question born entirely out of curiosity. Why do you have random notebooks from grade 5? I'm pretty sure I threw everything away right after I was finished with it. Though I also have no toys or childhood stuff so I don't know, maybe I'm weird.

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I found my old cringe writing. #13
It's real easy to just toss something in your closet and then forget about it for long enough that by the time you find it, it's more like a weird time capsule instead of just junk.

Hux

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I found my old cringe writing. #14
As a sincere question born entirely out of curiosity. Why do you have random notebooks from grade 5? I'm pretty sure I threw everything away right after I was finished with it. Though I also have no toys or childhood stuff so I don't know, maybe I'm weird.
Blandest, August 16, 2020, 11:54:01 am
i kind of assumed everyone kept their old notebooks. the main reason i kept all of my old shit is because i do art, and i can't bear to throw away any old art that may be hidden amongst the writing. i have this little ritual where i pull out the dozens of sketchbooks i've accrued over the years and just marvel at the contents.

reminds me how far i've come, and also that some things never change. the stuff from middle school is usually a lot funnier for some reason.

Salubrious Rex