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October 03, 2022, 01:08:37 am

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Topic: 194: r/ecuseyourself  (Read 29579 times)

McMillan and Waifu

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194: r/ecuseyourself #30

Runic

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194: r/ecuseyourself #31
Cheapskate, please tell me that you had someone tell you that they'd done six years worth of army stuff in eight months. I need to believe that this is true. I want to believe.

Cheapskate

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194: r/ecuseyourself #32
Cheapskate, please tell me that you had someone tell you that they'd done six years worth of army stuff in eight months. I need to believe that this is true. I want to believe.

Not in those exact words.

Nemo2342

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194: r/ecuseyourself #33
Custody guy reminds me that a few years back, I made some Xtranormal videos featuring the very best of my divorce cases. Some facts have been changed and exaggerated, but probably not as much as you'd like to think.

Female client: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXKqbB8bJIM
Male client: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFf5NPfj4Wk

I don't know who I hate more: custody guy, or these new examples of worthless human beings.

Glitterbomber

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194: r/ecuseyourself #34
Yea I have a buddy who's a divorce lawyer and while I wanted to at first say 'this is clearly a troll' then I asked him about it and he was all 'yea no that sounds legit, the world is a trash fire and I pray for death' and then he unhinged his jaw and just screamed for twenty minutes.

Ok maybe that last couple bits was exaggerated, but yea according to him while obviously the internet is a throne of lies, even if he was trolling that dude totally syncs up with other very real shitbags that pull shit like that. Apparently 'if I file for custody first I win right' is like, a super common idea people have.

Runic

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194: r/ecuseyourself #35
Cheapskate, please tell me that you had someone tell you that they'd done six years worth of army stuff in eight months. I need to believe that this is true. I want to believe.

Not in those exact words.
Oh my God that's a thing of incandescent beauty right there.

goombapolice

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194: r/ecuseyourself #36


I expected the colander, but I'm surprised that they let him smile. You're actually not supposed to.

I bet after all the shit they went through with him, they saw him smile and went "fffuuuuck this I'm not going through two more weeks of this shit" and just took the damn picture

Isfahan

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194: r/ecuseyourself #37
Custody guy reminds me that a few years back, I made some Xtranormal videos featuring the very best of my divorce cases. Some facts have been changed and exaggerated, but probably not as much as you'd like to think.

Female client: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXKqbB8bJIM
Male client: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFf5NPfj4Wk

I'll crosspost my reply from SA:

Quote
"I heard my kids were sad while I was gone during training... Special Forces training."

You have to be at least E-4 before you can go out for Special Forces selection. If you pass selection, THEN you start training. In other words, you can't start Special Forces training eight months in.

Quote
"And so I asked my commanding officer if I could go home. And he said that I was doing real good and had done six years' worth of Army stuff in eight months so I could go home early."

More realistic: "And so I asked my commanding officer if I could go home. He laughed in my face for so long that I missed chow."

Quote
"Um, well, they don't keep [discharge records] for the Special Forces guys. Because it's secret."

HAHAHA WRONG AGAIN YOU GODDAMN LIAR

Quote
"And I lost all my medals and my papers and stuff in a boating accident."

And this is just... hm. Well, yeah, okay, that actually does happen all the time.
Liatai

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194: r/ecuseyourself #38
Quote
"I heard my kids were sad while I was gone during training... Special Forces training."

CUE JAMES BOND MUSIC

Neal

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194: r/ecuseyourself #39
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?

A Meat

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194: r/ecuseyourself #40
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?

Only if "orb" replaces "video game"

Agent (gobble, gobble) Coop

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194: r/ecuseyourself #41
I demand more word filter.

Ambious

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194: r/ecuseyourself #42
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?

Only if "orb" replaces "video game"

I can see it now - "It's about ethics in orb journalism!"

Neal

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194: r/ecuseyourself #43
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?

Only if "orb" replaces "video game"

I can see it now - "It's about ethics in orb journalism!"

Things in Orbs That Make You Angrier Than They Should

Agent (gobble, gobble) Coop

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194: r/ecuseyourself #44
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?

Only if "orb" replaces "video game"

I can see it now - "It's about ethics in orb journalism!"

Things in Orbs That Make You Angrier Than They Should
Shout Opinions About Orbs Into The Void