Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
September 15, 2019, 03:31:01 am

ballp.it is the community forum for The F Plus.

You're only seeing part of the forum conversation. To see more, register for an account. This will give you read-only access to nearly all the forums.

Topic: 194: r/ecuseyourself  (Read 16843 times)

McMillan and Waifu

  • Paid
  • ruining the black metal scene worldwide
    • 115
    • 19
194: r/ecuseyourself #30

Lemon, November 19, 2015, 01:00:08 pm

PASTAFARI STANDS ALONE

Runic

  • Is Putting A Donk On It
  • Paid
  • John Brown did nothing wrong
  • 2,884
  • 72
194: r/ecuseyourself #31
Cheapskate, please tell me that you had someone tell you that they'd done six years worth of army stuff in eight months. I need to believe that this is true. I want to believe.

Cheapskate

  • Persnickety fussbudget
  • Paid
  • 548
  • 79
194: r/ecuseyourself #32
Cheapskate, please tell me that you had someone tell you that they'd done six years worth of army stuff in eight months. I need to believe that this is true. I want to believe.
Runic, November 19, 2015, 05:30:18 pm

Not in those exact words.

Nemo2342

  • Depleted Uranium Beholder
  • Paid
  • 118
  • 14
194: r/ecuseyourself #33
Custody guy reminds me that a few years back, I made some Xtranormal videos featuring the very best of my divorce cases. Some facts have been changed and exaggerated, but probably not as much as you'd like to think.

Female client:
Male client:
Cheapskate, November 19, 2015, 03:32:37 pm

I don't know who I hate more: custody guy, or these new examples of worthless human beings.

Glitterbomber

  • Paid
    • 251
    • 31
194: r/ecuseyourself #34
Yea I have a buddy who's a divorce lawyer and while I wanted to at first say 'this is clearly a troll' then I asked him about it and he was all 'yea no that sounds legit, the world is a trash fire and I pray for death' and then he unhinged his jaw and just screamed for twenty minutes.

Ok maybe that last couple bits was exaggerated, but yea according to him while obviously the internet is a throne of lies, even if he was trolling that dude totally syncs up with other very real shitbags that pull shit like that. Apparently 'if I file for custody first I win right' is like, a super common idea people have.

Runic

  • Is Putting A Donk On It
  • Paid
  • John Brown did nothing wrong
  • 2,884
  • 72
194: r/ecuseyourself #35
Cheapskate, please tell me that you had someone tell you that they'd done six years worth of army stuff in eight months. I need to believe that this is true. I want to believe.
Runic, November 19, 2015, 05:30:18 pm

Not in those exact words.
Cheapskate, November 19, 2015, 07:37:24 pm
Oh my God that's a thing of incandescent beauty right there.

goombapolice

  • a muscular, cum producing MONSTER
  • Paid
  • 656
  • 46
194: r/ecuseyourself #36

Lemon, November 19, 2015, 01:00:08 pm

I expected the colander, but I'm surprised that they let him smile. You're actually not supposed to.
Spacebat, November 19, 2015, 02:50:57 pm

I bet after all the shit they went through with him, they saw him smile and went "fffuuuuck this I'm not going through two more weeks of this shit" and just took the damn picture

Isfahan

  • Ask me about AKs.
  • Ridiculist
  • Trouble with customers? Isfahano cares.
    • 3,724
    • 70
194: r/ecuseyourself #37
Custody guy reminds me that a few years back, I made some Xtranormal videos featuring the very best of my divorce cases. Some facts have been changed and exaggerated, but probably not as much as you'd like to think.

Female client:
Male client:
Cheapskate, November 19, 2015, 03:32:37 pm

I'll crosspost my reply from SA:

"I heard my kids were sad while I was gone during training... Special Forces training."

You have to be at least E-4 before you can go out for Special Forces selection. If you pass selection, THEN you start training. In other words, you can't start Special Forces training eight months in.

"And so I asked my commanding officer if I could go home. And he said that I was doing real good and had done six years' worth of Army stuff in eight months so I could go home early."

More realistic: "And so I asked my commanding officer if I could go home. He laughed in my face for so long that I missed chow."

"Um, well, they don't keep [discharge records] for the Special Forces guys. Because it's secret."

HAHAHA WRONG AGAIN YOU GODDAMN LIAR

"And I lost all my medals and my papers and stuff in a boating accident."

And this is just... hm. Well, yeah, okay, that actually does happen all the time.
Liatai

STOG

  • human omnishambles
  • Ridiculist
  • from bean to cup, you fuck up
  • 1,716
  • 262
194: r/ecuseyourself #38
"I heard my kids were sad while I was gone during training... Special Forces training."

CUE JAMES BOND MUSIC

Neal

  • Mister Learning
  • Paid
  • a whimsical land of strange brain chemistry
  • 1,525
  • 45
194: r/ecuseyourself #39
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?

A Meat

  • Artificial Man Pop Seasoning
  • Paid
  • filled with delicious dude meat
  • 3,373
  • 139
194: r/ecuseyourself #40
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?
Neal, November 25, 2015, 12:52:42 pm

Only if "orb" replaces "video game"

AgentCoop

  • The Lord of Overstock
  • Paid
  • I must be, the Bahamas are islands
  • 2,798
  • 169
194: r/ecuseyourself #41
I demand more word filter.

Ambious

  • Guest
  • 0
194: r/ecuseyourself #42
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?
Neal, November 25, 2015, 12:52:42 pm

Only if "orb" replaces "video game"
A Meat, November 25, 2015, 01:40:04 pm

I can see it now - "It's about ethics in orb journalism!"

Neal

  • Mister Learning
  • Paid
  • a whimsical land of strange brain chemistry
  • 1,525
  • 45
194: r/ecuseyourself #43
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?
Neal, November 25, 2015, 12:52:42 pm

Only if "orb" replaces "video game"
A Meat, November 25, 2015, 01:40:04 pm

I can see it now - "It's about ethics in orb journalism!"
Ambious, November 25, 2015, 02:23:20 pm

Things in Orbs That Make You Angrier Than They Should

AgentCoop

  • The Lord of Overstock
  • Paid
  • I must be, the Bahamas are islands
  • 2,798
  • 169
194: r/ecuseyourself #44
Can we have "naturally developing intimacy" replace the word "sex" automatically on the forums?
Neal, November 25, 2015, 12:52:42 pm

Only if "orb" replaces "video game"
A Meat, November 25, 2015, 01:40:04 pm

I can see it now - "It's about ethics in orb journalism!"
Ambious, November 25, 2015, 02:23:20 pm

Things in Orbs That Make You Angrier Than They Should
Neal, November 25, 2015, 04:30:16 pm
Shout Opinions About Orbs Into The Void