Okay, so. Mealitary.
First off, I'm pretty sure cafeterias exist already, so this idea is just a cafeteria with no decorations in the dining area which you pay a premium to eat in. Let's put that aside, however.
Military chow halls do not serve fine cuisine, and fine cuisine cannot be served chow-hall style. Cafeterias—and especially institutional cafeterias—are designed such to serve a large quantity of people in a short amount of time. This means entrées which are easily cooked in large quantities and able to be served from chafing dishes. Items which do not qualify as baked goods are designed to be easily scoopable or spoonable. Lasagna is about as fancy as it gets, though this, too, will probably be scooped. If the guy behind the counter is putting caviar in your tray with an ice-cream scoop (or, more accurately, probably a melon baller), you're in for a bad time. I would not trust that caviar.
The military breakfast is bulk sausage, scrambled eggs (again, easily scoopable), a biscuit, grits if you like grits (scoopable), and on a good day, maybe Eggo waffles. Not terrible, but not haute cuisine, and certainly not worth whatever these jokers are imagining they'll charge. If you want toast, there's some fucking Wonder bread and a twenty-year-old toaster oven at the end of the line. Go toast it. Jam? Get the fuck out of here, where do you think you are? IHOP? Go out into the ville and pay money if you want that fancy jam shit.
Lunch is probably veal and instant mashed potatoes (the ultimate scoopable food, mashed potatoes are present at every meal). The Army has a disturbing abundance of veal; I ate it three times a week in basic training, and less often once I was done there, but it was at every chow hall everywhere. At least they called it veal, and since I've never had veal outside of a chow hall I don't really have a frame of reference. It was chicken-fried... meat, very dark, too thin and spongy to be beef. It could have been ground-up raccoon for all I know. Now I know what you're thinking: veal is almost or could conceivably be considered part of haute cuisine if it's prepared right. Trust me, though, if they served in Mealitary what soldiers get served, they'd be out of business and the place would probably be burned down by a mob of irate yuppies within a week. There is also the stereotypical shit on a shingle: creamed chipped beef. That still shows up plenty often. Well, the "shingle" portion of that combination has since faded from the limelight a bit. You want toast? You want a shingle for your shit? Do what you did at breakfast.
Dinner is whatever didn't get eaten at lunch. It's probably been reheated, because Uncle Sam loves his nieces and nephews, yes he does.
Nobody takes drink orders, much less "floating around" while they do it. You get a cup and a soda fountain, there's your drinks. You want water? Hold down the little thing which makes water come out instead of soda. And there's no ice. There's never ice. The military has lost the technology behind making ice. 10th Mountain Divison comes back from exercise and everyone crowds around them, saying "Did you see ice? Was it cold? Tell me what the ice was like!*" The syrup hookup for the Dr. Pepper is busted, and has been forever. You will never have Dr. Pepper. There is only Pepsi and Orange Slice until you change duty station, but the Dr. Pepper will probably be busted at the next chow hall too.
AND FURTHERMORE COMMA chow halls on permanent military installations are made of cinder block, not concrete, and sure as shit not marble. Walls are decorated with glossy white paint to drive home that mental-hospital feeling along with the finest lowest-bidder hotel-room artwork available from the local strip mall. There are probably plastic potted plants lining the divider sections, but if they are there, they will be dusty, because the only clean which counts in the military is a clean floor. There can be black mold growing in the ceiling tiles and the fabric on all of the Cold-War-era chairs can be covered with the mystery stains of ten thousand asses and meals, but God help you if that floor is not mopped and buffed.
In other words, Mealitary is not meal-spec**.
* this joke is super funny, folks, trust me
** this one too
