A few Christmases ago my mum bought me a fake cat. It's not actually stuffed or anything, but it looks very much like it could be. It's profoundly creepy and terrifying, so after thanking her with total insincerity I put it at the back of a wardrobe in my parents' house, went home to London and forgot all about it. When I came to visit again a few months later, I found it on my bed. There was a brief moment of scrabbling fear, but then I chucked it in a different wardrobe and went about my day. That night, when I went to bed, it was sitting on my pillow. The same thing happened the next night, and the next, and every night for the rest of my stay, despite my increasingly elaborate attempts to hide it. This has been going on for several years, including this Christmas. I'm back in London now, but for all I know it could be sitting on my bed right now. It probably is. I assume it's my mum who keeps putting it there, although I've never caught her in the act (believe me, I've tried) and we've never mentioned it. The other possibility is that it's the cat, but I'd rather not consider that.